We’re in week 13, people. Where does the time go? Seems like a mere 3 months ago that the season started. Ahh, memories… Say, do you guys like going to see the ponies? Not my-little-pony, brah, I’m talking the track, where they race the horses. For money. You get to see dirty, desperate people throw their last few shekels on an equine dream, which mostly ends sadly, but sometimes, just sometimes, you get to see a moment of pure excitement, approaching ecstasy, when a long-shot filly comes in, and someone wins big. It’s glorious to see a seemingly sad little man so happy for once. I want you to be that sad little man, gentle reader, it too would be glorious. So lets take a stroll down to the stables, and take a look at the stallions, and see whom we should hitch our cart to, and who’s destined for the glue factory, shall we?Please, blog, may I have some more?
Did everyone survive their holiday, hmm? I know not everyone who reads the Razzball basketball articles are from the US, but seeing as the NBA is based in the continental United States (save the Raptors, from my hometown of Toronto, Canada!), we will default to the US holiday schedule. Sorry Buddists, you get screwed. Again. But until Krishna can dunk a basketball, we’re going with Thanksgiving and Christmas, as it affects the game schedule, as well as our hearts. The reason I like Thanksgiving from a fantasy perspective, is that it indicates the first quarter of the fantasy season is done – we’ve just rounded the first post. Which is relevant, why? You should know where your squad’s deficiencies are by now, and, theoretically, the guys to target to address said needs. It’s a process, fella, so don’t freak out if you’re not on top, nor feel too smug if you sit upon the throne thus far. I have been waiting in the weeds with Kevin Durant, for example, so I hope to be rising in the ranks in my Razzball league (League Awesome, for those who are uninformed). Perhaps some of these following cats can help you in your climb:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Some big games last night! Easily the most fun Tuesday we’ve had on the young season. Twas a… Ruby Tuesday? There’s really no good Tuesday references… Have you ever thought about how much Tuesday sucks? There’s nothing interesting at all about Tuesday! Tuesday is just a lost day… Except let’s hope you were able to watch some hoops action, as this Tuesday was a big one!
And none bigger than LaMarcus Aldridge torching Denver, putting up 39 Pts on 16-30 shooting. What’s hilarious about his 39/11/1/0/2 line is that one assist was a high-low pass to the awful Robin Lopez for the game-winning layup with one second left. Surprised Lopez didn’t botch it! When you have Sonic the Hedgehog as your haircut, it’s got to be distracting… L.A. with all that production with no TO and 7-9 FT is showing us why he’s boring, but reliable as a second-round fantasy producer. It’s easy to miss the solid volume FT% and if he gets that 3-pointer dropping like the 0.5 he’s bringing this year – a new development for L.A. – it’s icing on the cake. Mostly this whole open was just to highlight I’m up 3-0 on Slim in our 30-point challenge! Even after his slimy Kevin Durant pick. Slimy, I say! I think Aldridge has moved into that top 13 or 14 overall, with double-digit boards in six straight bringing those rebounds closer to the 11.1 we saw last year. If he can avoid any injuries, he’ll be a premiere day of the week, like Friday or something. No one wants to be a dud like Tuesday, which more than suitably personifies Robin Lopez. Henceforth, I will now call Tuesdays “Robin Lopez Day”. Here’s some other happenings that went on across the NBA on Robin Lopez Day:Please, blog, may I have some more?
So when I approached JB about returning to the Razzball fold, my first suggestion was to do something on wing players. As any veteran fantasy hoops junkie knows, the dudes with the SG/SF designation are superly dooperly useful. Most teams have multiple non-PG and non-PF slots, plus you have the UTIL slots. Old-timers have some fond memories of crazy Latrell Sprewell, a member of the Wing Hall of Fame, and conveniently forgetting how he choked P.J. Carlesimo so you didn’t feel bad about clicking him into your lineup.
Anyway, some other ideas were floated to JB, but he wouldn’t give up on the wings. I began to wonder if his obsession with the concept had anything to do with basketball.
It started with an email where JB confessed to being hungry for wings, then continued with mentions of wing sauce, wing hotness, wing bones, wing grease on hairy chests, wing-covered women’s underwear, and then finally an email in 200-point type that said “ME LIKE WINGS” with this image attached:
Finally, I got the memo, so here we are.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So any readers out there grow up in that emo scene or get into any of that stuff at the turn of the century? I was all about the band Thursday’s CD Full Collapse, and man, listening back to it now is ridiculous! Even in high school I could make fun of the music that was going on then, talking about how emo bands had a crier. But Paris in Flames legit sounds like there’s some dude in the corner cry-yelling! Hey, it beats the Slipnkot dude who’s one job is to bang the trashcan lid…
Where to start with the cryfest? I think we gotta go with Russell Westbrook, and well, hold a seance for all Thunder fans right now. Sustained a fracture in his hand last night, and will likely miss about a month. We’ll know more by later today, but I think OKC should change their uniforms to the Bubble Boy outfits. Look where that movie took Jake Gyllenhaall! Kinda hard not to think about picking up Sebastian Telfair, but he’s still behind the Donald Sloan-types. Shooting up with some medium-term value is Reggie Jackson if his ankle heals up. I’d look to see if he was dropped in your league, as now he’s a dynamite hold until healthy, as long as it’s not another month for him as well… We still don’t really have a clear picture, so I think Telfair can make a couple starts.
Then the other biggie… My Panthers… I was actually at the game, and man, the amount of angst and frustration in the stands really could’ve been an emo wah-party. Pop quiz, who had more TOs – Cam or the main Cav?! Well, it was the main Cav, but we’ll start there and then get into everything else that went down last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Uh oh… Brandon Knight had a good game… JB’s gonna talk about his Brandon Knight infatuation all year now! Great…
One of my big sleeper calls last year (which was, only, kindasorta right), I again came into this season with Knight well ahead of the consensus (six spots ahead of the next highest among 25 experts – the only one in green!). And while his knight (womp womp) was still redonkulous, there was more to like than only the stat line. Went 22/8/13/0/1 with 2 treys and 10-10 FT. But what’s to salivate over is he led the Bucks in minutes, clearly started the game as the PG, and both Kendall Marshall and Nate Wolters didn’t get off the bench. Jerryd Bayless was the only backup PG to get off the pine for a measly 14 minutes. I think a big hesitation for fantasy owners was if Knight was going to play more SG like he did down the stretch last year, having his dimes eaten away like Raymond Felton at a CiCis. Certainly looks like that won’t be the case, and when I face opposing fantasy teams, Knight is going to be my Public Enemy #1. Here’s what else went down in our first big slate of games for the 2014-15 season:Please, blog, may I have some more?
With the full 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Rankings now complete, let’s take a look at the top 100. After a week filled with triumphs, successful trades going through, and possibly the biggest news of the offseason – Jared Dudley getting moved. I couldn’t finish the top 100 without knowing where Dudley would be! The ramifications would be catastrophic! So past 75 you’re starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel. The dregs of the cask. Which means it’s sleeper land! Bring out the sleeper patrol! And a lot of times if you hit on just one of these and avoid injuries in your early rounds, you’re set for a playoff run. Here’s my top 100 for the 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Season (based on 9-cat H2H):Please, blog, may I have some more?
Razzball Nation! You’ve seen a dime a dozen… And no I’m not talking about lady parts or buttcheeks on Game of Thrones…. But mock 2014 NBA Drafts! And since Game of Thrones is the hottest thing on TV, Slim and I decided to join the fray. Let’s pretend he’s built like Drogo, the facial hair is fa rizz folks, and I back-and-forth with him like whatever the hell that giant was north of the wall. But not like that! Wait, this just got way off track…
What we did differently is alternate picks to adjust our thoughts and expectations accordingly. Slim thinks Embiid to the Cavs, I think it’s Wiggins, many others think Parker… We then have to make new thoughts as we go, and track players falling to get them to their upcoming destinations. We both go into why we made that pick for the team, and a quick blurb on their fantasy impact on said destination should it come to fruition. Here’s how we see the 2014 NBA Draft’s First Round going down:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oh man, rough night for matt’s Pacers! Al Jefferson just went absolutely bonkers, adding to his stretch of bonkertude giving Jefferson owners a huge boost for the playoffs. Owning Roy Hibbert like an Entertainment 720 entrepreneur, Big Al shot 16-25 in a full multi-cat dance party of 34/8/3/1/1 and even hit a three! Only his sixth of his career to pepper all the cats. Over his last 3, Jefferson has hit 44 of 65 shots for a very high volume 67.7 FG%. Jefferson hasn’t played this well since his Minnesota days, and you can even argue this has been a career year. Which for a guy with the history Jefferson has put down in the stat sheets is really saying something considering how rocky it all started. Remember the ankle issue that had him sit a lot of games? Then the slow start? Because I sure do, and I steadfastly said “Hold me tighter baby!” Is that a song? I feel like there’s something close to that… Anyway, hopefully you were able to buy low or weather the storm and now you’re reaping some big man stats like it’s the 90s. We miss you David Robinson! Two losses in a row for the Pacers, right after barely beating the Jazz. The Heat are now only 1.5 games behind, and might be taking the Pacers piece of the home-court advantage pie! Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Bulls are a lot like the Tanner children. Whatever the hell the name of the youngest the Olsen Twins played is Derrick Rose – all sorts of famous but now all sorts of a mess. The middle one is Kirk Hinrich. Because as soon as he’s not on the Bulls anymore, he’s gonna become so irrelevant that even Tom Thibodeau will forget who he was the next season. Which leaves us with D.J. who is obviously – D.J. Augustin. I mean, Bob Saget should’ve just stopped at the first kid! Well I guess there’s still upside with the youngest one. This metaphor is tanking JB! I feel as if you readers are starting profanity-laced rants thus far. Just like Bob Saget’s stand-up “act”! Hey-oh! So Hinrich got hurt yet again last night, doing something to his hammy. It’s almost as if you can predict injuries! Part of my gravitation to D.J. was not only how well he was fitting with the team, but how brittle Captain Kirk is. I would make a Star Trek parallel, but it’s TNG or nothing, son! Besides, the TV show metaphors are a strong 0/1 this morning… Augustin is in line for huge run and in 37 minutes last night went 27/4/4 with 5 threes. I expect pretty high-teen scoring and 6-8 dimes a night with a couple of treys while Hinrich is out, then maintaining the starting role when Hinrich is back with minimal dropoff. More-or-less a must own in all leagues, and I’ve been Bull[hah!]ish on him all along. Hopefully you’ve scooped him up and held on to him. Here’s what else I saw in fantasy hoops on a busy day of MLK action:Please, blog, may I have some more?