To Dennis Green and the Arizona Cardinals, the 2006 Chicago Bears were who they thought they were.

To Caitlyn Jenner, Bruce Jenner pre-2015 wasn’t who she thought he was.

And to fantasy basketball owners, Derrick Favors hopefully isn’t who he’s looking like he is. Or was. Or could be.

What is it about Favors that makes us ignore his inconsistent ways and clamor for him to be on our teams year after year?

Maybe it’s the allure of a rebounding power forward who could easily average a 20-10 with at least a block a game. Maybe it’s his name, which just sounds stud-ish.

But if you have Favors on your team, he probably frustrates you, right? He’ll go on a run, mixing double-doubles with mid-20s scoring nights, and then he’ll plop one or two turdburgers in the middle – like his five-point, seven-rebound Friday the 13th horror show – which might have cost you in a head-to-head matchup.

It’s tempting to say ah, he’s 24, he’ll become more consistent. But if you go back and look at his season-long game logs, you’ll start to hear the ghost of 2006 Dennis Green again … he just might be what we thought he was.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Well, you might lose your patience after I plagiarized last week’s title and didn’t even have a rhyme-y pun in it!  I’m like the Robert De Niro of short filmmaking

But it is interesting that we’ve had back-to-back weekends of patience paying off.  It’s like having to hold it in and thinking of baseball to make it last!  Although when I think of baseball I think of Grey, so it’s not making anything last!  The injuries have been ridiculously frustrating the past two years, but this last one was just a bad cut that Terrence Jones accidentally squeezed lemon juice in when he was making shrimp scampi.  At least it wasn’t a leg or body part injury, so I remained firm in my Tjones love.  A lot of commenters were asking about selling Tjones away for virtually nothing, and there was even some drop Tjones sentiment.  After a pretty lowly return last Wednesday, Jones showed everyone how good he is when his run is normalized, putting up 23 Pts on Friday and Saturday, with 23/7/0/0/4 and 23/6/1/1/3 lines hitting well over 50% from the field with a combined 4 treys.  I can’t think of baseball fast enough when seeing those numbers!  As I quickly change my pants, it’s probably too late to swing some buy low offers and hopefully you own Tjones in several leagues to ride the wave.  If anyone wants to pay top-30 or 40 value (doubtful), Jones does have the inherent risk of more injuries, so I might sell him off at that price.  But I’m not looking at this weekend as a fluky, sell-high couple of games.  Pateince is a Tjones!  Here’s what else went down over the weekend in fantasy hoops action, and The 7 Ahead for week 4:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

On the heels of one of the more graphic injuries in recent memory, Indiana Pacer forward Paul George began the 2015 NBA season surrounded by questions regarding his ability to reclaim his All-Pro status. Leading all scorers with 27 points in the Pacers win against the Magic, George is silencing any remaining critics as he recorded his fourth-straight 20 point outing. Starting at the 4 yesterday, George logged 7 assists, 4 rebounds, and 1 steal while going 3-6 from beyond the arc. Despite the preseason outcry surrounding his shift from a starting wing to a small-ball power forward, the Fresno State product is playing like a superstar once again. His re-ascension has been a blessing for fantasy owners as George continues to play like a true superstar. The only real knock on his fantasy value is his high rate of turnovers, as he set a season-high of 6 last night. While there are no points for generic and cliche nicknames, fantasy fans should cherish George’s willingness to be called “PG-13,” since it made it a whole helluva lot easy to name the article.

But before we break pace and starting making too many overdone jokes, here’s what else went down yesterday in fantasy hoops action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

When you go out on a limb on a guy and it starts slow, at least I can pull the “it’s a long season” card.  Or the “his back has been a little spasmy” card.  Hah, little Pod joke there…

I gotta say, I love you commenters here on Razzball.  A lot of Andrew Wiggins frustration has been thrown around, like “he single-handedly killed my FG%”, and “he’s why I started 1-8”, and “Wiggins must be dating yet another one of those Kardashians”.  But I was really honored to say almost all of the vitriol wasn’t at me.  Hell, I was expecting to be served on the coals for that one!  Or some sort of cliche that works…  Maybe it was out of the decency of your hearts since I obviously own him on several teams with this rank.  I got way more hate for saying Nate Robinson was a good opening night streamer/last draft pick in 12ers!  But like the worst drunken one night stand in history, I got rid of Nate about 4 or 5 minutes in.  While with Wiggins, I’m entrenched in a life-long relationship.  Hope my wife isn’t reading this!  After a really rocky start, Wiggins finally looked like the breakout talent I was hoping for on Saturday night against the Bulls, going 31/3/2/0/1 with only 1 TO and hit 4 treys.  Of course it wouldn’t be a pristine line, but then again what relationship is suddenly perfect?!  Except my marriage of course!  Wiggy still shot like poo (11-27) and had an odd 5-10 FT game.  He’s usually gonna be a high-volume 80% guy from the stripe, plus he hit 4-5 from deep, so there’s still hope the FG% climbs as his bum back gets healthier and he shoots his way out of it.  Of course you can point to Kevin Martin not playing (personal) for the burst in treys, but big picture we still think K-Mart gets moved.  Even with K-Mart, they’re using him as a 6th man and Wiggy is the only real perimeter option in the starting 5 anyway.  I also think with a little more health, he’ll play more aggressive on D.  The one swat he had was a legit one, not a lazy strip that’s scored a block, WHICH STILL FRUSTRATES ME!  The buy low window is closing rapidly, so if you’re still hoping to buy in on Wiggy, I’d wait until tonight and see if he has another rough shooting game before opening the floodgates.  If you own Wiggy, definitely hold, particularly with the Wolves playing 5 games this week. Here’s what else went down over the weekend in NBA action, plus The 7 Ahead for week 3:

Please, blog, may I have some more?





The list of superlatives that can be applied to Andre Drummond is a long one. The Pistons big man went berserk on Tuesday night with his second straight 20/20 game. To be precise, he went for 25 & 29 – the second 25/25 of his career. For perspective on just how good he’s been so far this season:

  • Only player since NBA/ABA merger to have 75 points and 75 rebounds through his first four games
  • First player since Kareem with multiple 20/20 games in his first four games
  • No other Piston has had a single 25/25 game in the last 30 years

Drummond had 11 offensive rebounds tonight which was more than any other player had in this game…combined. If the points and boards weren’t enough, he also tossed in three steals and a block for good measure.

The one knock on AD has always been (and will continue to be) his poor free throw shooting. At .403 FT% for his career, it’s quite the albatross. But this season – early as it may be – Drummond is up to .576 (19-33), making owners who thought they were punting the category feel pretty darn good about their chances across the board.

The stars seem to have aligned for Andre to post a truly special season. Lane-clogging Greg Monroe is gone. Stan Van Gundy isn’t afraid to play his starters heavy minutes and the team is winning (i.e. rewarding this approach). A summer of work with a shooting coach is paying immediate dividends at the foul line. At this point, the only thing that could conceivably derail this train is injury…and Drummond has only missed one game in the last two years, so there are no concerns about chronic or lingering ailments.

Now on to the rest of the happenings from an eventful Tuesday night of round ball…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I know, I know this is way too early to make any calls regarding players, but I’m going to anyway.  After watching the last two days of games, here are some premature 8-cat bold calls for the 2015-2016 season:

Nikola Mirotic
He’s had two very impressive games and is now averaging 18.5 pts/3.5 threes/9 rebounds/1 assist/1.5 steals/0.5 blocks on 52% from the field & 100% from the line on 4 attempts a game.

This is a very hot start and for roto leagues is absolutely fantasy gold. He opens up the Bulls offense and it’s clear that 30 minutes is within reach. It looks like everything is breaking right for Mirotic with Joakim Noah already injured.  A top 30 finish is within sight.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I’m pretty sure Stephen Curry looks at fantasy ADPs.  He’s like, “I’m not a runaway consensus #1, and this labradoodle Brow IS?!”

Of course I started writing this open when Anthony Davis was 1-16, then he got red hot AND MADE TWO IN A ROW!  Somebody cool him off, he’s NBA Jam on fire!  Brow was more uncomfortable with the ball in his hands than watching Scary Movie 2 with your parents last night, wrapping up with a 4-20 FG outing.  Might be the worst reference to 420 I’ve ever seen!  10-15 FT helped salvage some points – and he got his 3 swats – but 18/6/2/0/3 with 5 TO and a deathstroke to your FG% is not what the #1 pick ordered.  Curry on the other hand treated New Orleans like Hurricane Katrina!  Too rough?  Fine, then he treated them like BP…   Yikes, Nawleans has had a rough ride.  Then their NBA team has everyone get hurt!  Steph just straight whipped it out (I mean his MVP trophy!) and pummeled the Pelicans and their awful PG for 40/6/7/2/0 on 14-26 FG (5-12 3PTM 7-7 FT).  Hey, it’s opening night, and the Warriors are phenomenal at disrupting big men.  And the Pelicans had all their PG minutes played by guys on the street a week ago.  Hopefully you own Curry in a league or two, and I’m literally about to spam Brow owners as hard as LinkedIn emails.  Seriously, I don’t care if some recruiter looked at my profile, I don’t need an email on that ish!  No, no, blurb on Ish Smith is later…  What an awful Pelicans team…  Here’s what else went down on NBA’s opening night:

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Pearls don’t lie on the seashore. If you want one, you must dive for it.

(Yep, I just dropped a Chinese proverb, so y’all know this article is about to go next level…)

I’ve always found it fun to read – and write – some of the more unconventional or against-the-grain prognostications for the upcoming fantasy basketball season, and it can be a gas to revisit them at various points throughout the year to see if they’re gaining any traction or skidding wildly off the road. It probably goes without saying, but the bolder (see: nuttier) the prediction, the less likely it is to bear fruit. So the intent here is to provide an unpopular – but not unrealistic – take on a player that may actually help you during your fantasy draft. You’re likely to disagree with most (they’d be the consensus if you didn’t) but if I can hit on one akin to last year’s “take a late-round swing at Rudy Gobert and hold him until starter minutes come available,” it can be a season defining gamble. So pick your favorite(s) and let’s go diving for pearls together! (Man, that is without a doubt the least cool analogy I’ve ever come up with. But it’s a call-back to the opening line which I thought was kinda clever, so I’m gonna own it.)

Prepare the hot takes cannon as we fire off 30 bold fantasy basketball predictions (one for each NBA team) for the 2015/2016 season:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Yeah. It goes like this right here. It’s the return of the writings of Slim! That reminds of an Outkast song, and that song reminds me of 1998. If you don’t remember it was the year we learned there was yet another way to be disgusted by a cigar. That near, far, wherever you are you probably found yourself at some point rooting for the most unlikeliest of protagonists, Billy Zane. And of course it was the year the ‘Blue Screen of Death‘ truly became a meme, long before anyone knew what a meme was.

Gangstaaaaa… It’s the return… turn…

In the NBA draft that year there were 3 guys drafted that are still playing and should one day be in the Hall of Fame. I’ll give you a hint, the top 3 draft picks were Michael Olowokandi, Mike Bibby, and Raef LaFrentz, and if you were playing fantasy basketball back then you might have gone all-in on one of them. Give up? They are Vince Carter, Dirk Nowitzki, and Paul Pierce. Pick number 5, 9, and 10 respectively. That’s not to say great players aren’t drafted 1st, but the only thing guaranteed when you are first overall is a whole boat load of money. Something about the use of the word ‘only’ there doesn’t quite feel right.

Return… Ganstuhuhuh… It’s the re…

It seems so easy to see when you’re talking time traveling, something mind unraveling. Get Down. It’s a whole lot harder to do here and now using some funky combination of math, logic, illogical fandom, a random number generator, and of course the occasional dart throw. For some reason though, after about an hour on 350 (or about 176c) it develops a creamy caramel colored crust. Once it cools, just cut it up and consume. So here’s you’re 1st taste. Slim’s, I can’t believe I’m writing this in 3rd person, RCL playoff schedule post.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

rcl-basketball-logoThe NBA fantasy draft season is upon us! With plenty of terrible early projections going on, early drafts are always fun.  This is basically going to be a recap of my first RCL draft of the season, with a little of bit of sleeper info thrown in for good measure.  I really love the team I got in this league, even though I was sniped on a few picks.  Just FYI I’ll be setting up another RCL league in about a week or so – to draft in October – so I hope some more of you guys join me!  By then Yahoo’s rankings should be much closer to the ballpark of reason… At any rate, let’s dive in!

Please, blog, may I have some more?