As I peeled myself off the linoleum floor, sucked down the last few drops of last night’s Bitburger beer and licked the crusted schnitzel off my fingertips, the memories of last night’s NBA Finals celebration reignited in my mind. Dirk is a champion.Please, blog, may I have some more?
One more night. I know I’ve got a long summer filled with postseason rankings ahead of me. Not to mention keepers, sleepers, rookies, lockout news, more lockout news, Ron Artest-is-bored-and-crazy news, Greg Oden-is-progressing-and-looking-forward-to-a-lockout-shortened season news, Hey-is-that-Luke-Ridnour?-Why-is-he-even-in-this-state-much-less-at-my-laundromat-news, preseason rankings, and the inevitable process of writing about fantasy basketball if there is no real basketball.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Perennial first-rounder Chris Paul slammed his noggin yesterday, hit the ground with a stillness that silences crazed stadiums, was carted off the court amid extended hush and finally gave a thumbs up to signify … that his hand wasn’t paralyzed, I guess.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Okay, so you saw GrizzMaster Gay shoot a pair of free throws, clutch his shoulder and leave the game for good on Tuesday. You went to bed worried that your team’s second-best player was done for the year. You dreamed about it.Please, blog, may I have some more?
For 23 years, Utah head coach Jerry Sloan won 60 percent of his games (1,221 of ‘em in the regular season), made it to the Finals twice, got knocked out in one of the first two rounds 18 other times, confused dozens of players with his occasionally incoherent, but nevertheless longwinded mumblings, and stunted the capital growth of NBA tie salesmen for almost three decades.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So O.J. Mayo‘s life of crime isn’t working out as he hoped. First he gets his time with USC struck from the historical record after accepting swag, then his short time as a Bourré cardsharp ended with a black eye, and now he’s suspended 10 games for using the illegal muscle-builder DHEA.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Through the first half of the season, any Clipper talk has centered almost primarily around Blake Griffin‘s phatness or Baron Davis‘ fatness. Little respect has been paid to one of the surprise top 10 scorers in the league, Eric Gordon.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Lamar Odom will have ‘problematic,’ lingering shoulder pain, according to Phil Jackson. I really appreciate when coaches expand on injury announcements by adding color with words like “problematic.” This lets us plebeians differentiate between injuries no one is happy to have from those that serve to improve lives; like that kid in ‘Rookie of the Year’ or Doc Brown’s run-in with the toilet back in 1955.Please, blog, may I have some more?
The big news from the weekend is that Glen Davis damn near triple-doubled on Sunday against the Raptors. Wait, that was the XXL news from the weekend. Sorry. I keep my news sizes as confusing as movie theater popcorn sizes. Wait, the medium is the smallest size you can order?Please, blog, may I have some more?