We’re only but a few games into the 2014-2015 NBA season and we’ve already had a lot injuries to promising young players. Here’s the Week 1 injury update:

After getting an inadvertent elbow to the face in practice, Victor Oladipo is out for the first month of the season with a facial fracture. No injury is a blessing, but the time off will give Oladipo ample time to rest his MCL. He had previously missed games in the preseason due to the sprained MCL in his right knee.

Elfrid Payton will continue to start at point guard, with or without Oladipo in the lineup. There will be some growing pains, but he’s a star in the making. To replace Oladipo at shooting guard, the Magic will rely on Ben Gordon and Evan Fournier. Ben Gordon is coming off of a horrible season, where he averaged 5.2 ppg in 14.7 mpg. His minutes, scoring, and field goal percentages have all declined in the last three years. Now he could have a game or two where he explodes for some threes, like he did against the Wizards on Thursday (22 points on 7-12 shooting), but I wouldn’t count on it and waste a roster spot waiting for those games. He scored only 5 points on 1-8 shooting in the first game. Gone are the days where he is worthy of a fantasy spot.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I don’t know why JB would do this to me. Do you know what he told me?  He told me I didn’t fit in.  He told me my only chance of being accepted was for me to join some program he was calling, “Avatar”.  I believe his exact words were, “Yeah we can change your avatar, what were you thinking?”  Wait… this was my idea?  Was it me who asked him to take my sexy, bearded, aboriginal face and join it with my real life sexy, bearded, non-aboriginal face?  I can’t tell what is reality and what is a dream anymore.  All I do know is that in this world of mixed mediums, my body, or as JB keeps calling it, my “Avatar”, is merely a shell for my one track mind.  A mind dedicated only to fantasy basketball; unfortunately sometimes this mind can wonder.  Wonder back to yesteryear when Patrick Beverley was a sleeper or when Alec Burks was supposed to start for the Jazz.  In an attempt to relieve those nostalgic days, I present to you my beginning of the season All Under-Owned Team.  My cutoff was 30% owned in Yahoo leagues and hopefully with season-long appeal.

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What a night for the Brow!

On a near-unparalleled night for my bold call for MVP yesterday and Razzball’s #1 fantasy pick, I’ve gotta say, it feels like it’s going to be a great season!  An unbelievable 26/17/2/3/9 in a near trip-dub with the blocks, and fitting he’d be 2014-15’s first rainbow line (at least 2 Pts/Reb/Ast/Stl/Blk).  In H2H leagues, if you have Brow you better win blocks this week!  Not only were those blocks more than enough, but Brow was a solid 10-22 from the field (6-9 FT), and didn’t commit a single TO.  About all you could complain about is if you play in a triple-doubles league, he just needed one more swat!  Just one!

Of the 25 experts on FantasyPros, only 5 had Brow #1 overall with yours truly one of the five, and Razzball’s Seth a second.  Now, before you go unloading your top 5 picks for Brow in a desperate trade, don’t forget this was against the Magic who looked pretty horrific.  Then again, Stephen Curry and LeBron James are going to have to do something outrageous to make the Brow non-believers feel better tomorrow…

Here’s what else went down across the league’s first three regular season games:

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It’s finally here!  “The lockout is over!”  You’re like, “wtf, a lockout?!”  I’m quoting a Dave Cowens commercial!  And after the 98-99 Lockout at that!  Anything vintage Hornets is nostalgic gold right now.  Ridiculous amounts of bonus points to readers who are Hornets fans and remember that commercial and/or can find the video.  Because I couldn’t!

The return of the Hornets is one of the many things I’m looking forward to this year.  Getting past my horrific Jonas Valanciunas love, finally changing the page to a new season, is another.  But one of the biggest is a healthy (for now) Kobe Bryant and the return of the “Guess Kobe Bryant’s Stat Line”!  Even if you’re a long-time reader, you might not know this one!  It’s like the NBA scheduled the Lakers on a light opening night just for this momentous Razzball event, not because the Lakers are a widely popular team or anything…

I don’t remember exactly what spawned this prestigious contest, but as with everything that is oddly conversational in Razzball, traditions can start any time!  Like how we all guessed what Kobe would do, the like, 5 games he played last year.  So in order to carry this tradition, and to accurately-ish credit the winner, guess the Kobe line will be limited to the PTS/REB/AST projection to determine the victor.  Feel free to guess more stats than that, but when we did it last year with steals and blocks and turnovers, it was hard to say which commenter was closer than another.  The winner gets a shout out in the recap the next day, along with the jealous ire of all other Razzballers… I think Kobe has a big one in the opener vs. Houston… I’m going 31/5/6.  Shoot your guesses below, and happy return to Fantasy Basketball!  We’re pumped for our biggest season to date here at Razzball, and thanks to everyone for checking us out through the offseason!

Here’s some other news and notes since the last wrap-up, and what I’ll be focusing on for opening night (and we’re daily every weekday with the wrap-ups here on out!):

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Razzball Nation!  Hopefully you’re hopping over here to boast your hardware.  To flaunt your gold.  To show us all your bigger red ass to display your dominance over us weakling chimps!  Most H2H leagues wrapped up last night, and I had a brutal year.  Multi-titles last year, not a one this time out.  But hey!  It’s been a fun season, and we’ve still got a few weeks left for other H2Hers and Roto players.  So we’ll be here!  And we’ve got a fun championship edition week coming at ya, with Slim’s REL acceptance speech along with Wednesday’s RCL Championship crowning.  Speaking of crowning, somebody get Aaron Brooks the iron throne (I thought about making a birthing joke instead, but that’s gross)!  Dude has been owning Westeros (I think that’s right, it’s hard to keep up with all the kingdoms when you haven’t read the books!), getting his second straight 40+ minute outing and blowing up for 24/8/15/3/0.  As I mentioned in the comments at some point last week, Brooks against the Rockets with no Patrick Beverley checking him was going to be saucy.  Then Ty Lawson had to sit on top of it!  Wow, that sentence comes off weird as a standalone…  Brooks looks to be an immediate add with Brian Shaw quoted that he’s not rushing Lawson back.  As well he shouldn’t, captain obvious!  Try and snatch up Brooks if you still can and ride him while Lawson sits on it, apparently.  Hah!  Here’s what else I saw over the weekend:

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No, you’re not accidentally on baseball and we’re not reviewing Roger Maris and Mickey Mantle’s little HBO romp. Wait, why does LeBron James get an asterisk then?!  I think the mask is helping him.  It’s like the Jim Carrey movie.  Without it he’s a nothing out there – –  dammit, metaphors and parallels just aren’t working today!  Unless the improbable scenario in which you pounded em hard at happy hour, passed out before tipoffs last night, stumbled to your computer when you awoke this morning, and Razzball Basketball is your first NBA news choice, then you probably saw what BronBron did last night.  I for one fully endorse the aforementioned scenario, see you at happy hour after work!  LeBron went bob-bonkers on the bob-Bobcats for 61 points shooting 22-33, 8-10 from deep, and 9-12 from the stripe.  Chipped in 7 boards and 5 dimes on top of it.  The gap Kevin Durant had over King James is slowly deteriorating as MaskBron is taking over Gotham City.  Now, it did help that there was no Dwyane Wade (not that it would’ve made that much of a difference), but KD is still your numero uno.  Twin towers!  I bet 50% of fantasy H2H title matchups will pit LeBron vs. KD.  Fantasy basketball is too top heavy followed by a bunch of bastard children.  It’s turning into Shawn Kemp!  Zing!  Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:

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Probably because he’s, well, Elton Brand, I haven’t paid much attention to him.  It’s like telling me, “Hey JB, Robert Parrish is on the wire, what’da think?!”  Brand is getting tons of run lately with Gustavo Ayon and Pero Antic still hurt decimating the Hawks 5s (and Paul Millsap out as well), to the tune of 40+ minutes the past two games and 30+ in 4 of 5.  And grandpa Elton topped off his big run with a rainbow line last night, 7/13/3/2/2 in 42 minutes.  That’s like an Andrew Bogut line!  Had a comment last night asking if Brand is a flash in the pan.  More like flash in the bedpan!  Yeah, I don’t see any sustainability here with none of the aforementioned hurt guys really out that long.  But hey, maybe a one-game stream?  The Hawks are going at Boston tonight who lack any sort of consistency up front as well and Brand could get ya another multi-cat gem.  Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:

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Oh man, it’s been a grueling season for a few of my fantasy teams.  I’m like Oliver Twist out there.  “Please, sir, give me some fantasy-more!”  But it’s always nice seeing one of my boys go out there and have himself a career weekend, like Mike Scott who put up 20 on Friday then a career-high 30 on Saturday.  #EmojiTats!  In 30 minutes (he scored a 30 for 30) shot 11-14 including 6-7 from deep.  Somebody step out on this guy!  Reminds me of when the old UNCW coach would keep our hapless defense in zone when the opps were hitting threes.  I remember when you were against us, Kent Bazemore!  Oh man, I gootta elaborate more on that…  Anyway, Scott went 30/8 with no other stats so it was a major-ThrAGNOF!  And remember, ThrAGNOF isn’t derogatory unless it’s one of those high-ranked guys.  Looking at you Klay Thompson.  Scott got the start for Paul Millsap whose knee is all syrupy, and Scott could pick up another start or two early this week.  Why you don’t need to draft threes!  Grab your kilt, prep your best Mel Gibson, and ride with your fellow Scott against the Longshanks.  Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in fantasy hoops:

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Oh man, a busy day yesterday in hoops!  The obvious first mention is GO HEELS!  Oh man, I feel like storming the court today.  I think Chapel Hill fans everywhere this morning should storm their office/classroom/crowded area in a flash mob at some point.  Then we have LeBron James getting his nose broken by Serge A Broke-a!  The mayor of Cleveland has already issued Serge Ibaka a key to the city.  Fine LeBron $5,000 for flopping!  Man, the next round of internet videos of “LeBroning” are going to be a lot more like “The Knockout Game”.  Seriously, even LeBron haters have to love he got it broke a step or two out before throwing it down.  Word still to come if the nose is indeed broken, but my money is on yes.  Regardless, we’ve seen a few players come back from a broken nose in the same game donning the Hannibal mask, so I doubt he misses any time after passing concussion tests last night.  MaskBron!  And then we had the trade deadline come and go, with nothing too major albeit a few surprises.  I’m starting a bit off the reservation with a guy I’m going to pump hard and is a pickup now in 12-teamers.  Lord Byron Mullens!  After trading their former starting 5 which we’ll get in below, it’s Mullens and Arnett Moultrie manning down the C fort in the abandon ship Sixers front line, with Mullens picked up for draft picks.  I know Mullens is boring, but he was usable while with the Bobcats posting a 10.6/6.4/1.5/0.6/0.6 line with 1.2 treys in 27 minutes a game in 12-13.  His sub-40 FG% blew, sure, but he’s a perimeter shooter who can play decent D so I think he will get run.  He’s a lot better than Moultire in my opinion and I think will get big minutes.  And I don’t know why, maybe it’s because he looks so goofy or maybe because he’s been in the league 5 years, but Mullens is actually only 25 when I thought he might be 30.  For a team tanking, he’s a perfect acquisition to help rack up points to try and fill maybe 2 more seats a night in Philly.  “Thanks for coming Mr. and Mrs. Mullens!”  Here’s what else went down yesterday, starting with NBA deadline deals:

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And we’re back baby!  The All-Star break in Nawleans has come and gone, with a disappointing dunk contest, no bounce passes in the skills contest (yeah, what was up with that Prez?!) and All-Star jerseys that made the finale look like an adult rec league game on a Thursday night.  “Help, I think Stanley has a hernia!”  I was constantly thinking to myself about the Major League quote, but the opposite.  Brian Scalabrine or Matt Bonner coming into their first practice with sleeves and a hat on, and their coaches were like, “We don’t wear caps and sleeves at this level son!”  Sure made that coach look stupid on Sunday night!  And if you’re a Cleveland fan, you’ve got to be thinking, “Crikey wtf is going on!?” after seeing Kyrie Irving and Dion Waiters go off in their respective ASB games over the weekend.  Then to see neither of them do anything against the 76ers last night!  To be fair, the Cavs let their scrubs do all their damage in a blowout.  So I guess if Cavs are thinking crikey, Philly fans are thinking, “if we don’t win 20 games this year, I’m giving up cheesesteaks!”  Drastic?  Probably.  Be liking asking me to give up that delicious BBQ.  Now I’m all sorts of hungry… How did this get into food?  Let’s just dive right in to last night’s return to action, like how you’d dive into an all-you-can-eat Southern food buffet with mac & cheese, hush puppies, chopped BBQ, whole BBQ, biscuits & gravy, and then, and then…:

Please, blog, may I have some more?