If you’re like me, you’re afflicted with the “March Madness”. And you love it. It consumes your every thought, much like the image of Sophia Veraga and Christina Hendricks, in nighties, you know, doing sexy things to each other…

Fun fact: the busiest day for booking vasectomies is the Wednesday before the beginning of the Tournament. So the snipped one can lounge on the couch all day with a bag of frozen peas on his mutilated nethers and take in 12 hours of frenzied basketball without being bothered by his lady. True fact, look it up. What I’m getting at is although you may be in the midst of your fantasy playoffs, we’re all too occupied to watch the hours of NBA required to give in depth analysis at the moment, as I have bag of peas on my junk. Metaphorically speaking. And I expect you to be a gracious partner and leave me to my tournament, and would it kill you to make me a sandwich?

Too far? Fine, here’s a smattering of add/drops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Elton Brand played 33 minutes in the Mavs/Thunder OT thriller Friday night and scored 10 points with 13 rebounds, 1 assist, 1 block, and he has now double-doubled in back to back games. You’ve been Branded! EB is starting to get comfortable with his new sixth man role, and Friday’s game was his fourth in a row scoring in double-digits, including a sweet season high 20 point game last Sunday.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Greetings! It is I, Tehol Beddict. Becoming internationally known for my scripture in the football section this past season, I was crowned league champion of all the fantasy experts, which has been a humbling experience. Behold, I come to you now, bearing massive quantities of basketball knowledge, to provide you with the insight you need to win your league title this year, as well as providing some humor along the way.

Please, blog, may I have some more?