Man, both NBA games last night were atrocious…  Even if the Rockets McDonald’s unis were effing awesome, love those 90s reds and yellows!

Gregg Popovich sat Manu Ginobili and Tim Duncan (on top of Marco Belinelli and Tiago Splitter injured) that’s sure to get Adam Silver pitching a tent in his NBA-fines PJs.  With no Duncan or Splitter, the Spurs had to play Aron Baynes and Boris Diaw at C.  Wow.  And against an inconsistent-at-best post player in Dwight Howard!  But Dwight destroyed his “defenders” and looked like a 17 year old high school kid with college aspirations playing against middle schoolers.  Like watching Taco Fall play against other high school JV teams.  Man, Taco makes a basketball look like a grapefruit!

There’s really only one explanation to last night’s travesty – Pop owns Dwight on his fantasy team.  And well, let’s guess Kevin McHale drafted Tim Duncan and was against Pop this week.  Pop DOES NOT like to lose in fantasy basketball.  I’d imagine when he talks to his fantasy opponents it goes something like this.  “What’s more powerful than me winning every year?  Hope.  That I’d ever let anyone else win!”  Dwight for 32/16/0/1/2 shooting 12-18 from the field.  It was pretty bad out there, matchup wise.  He did his Dwight thing missing FT but ended up fine hitting 8-13.  I’m very steadfast in my anti-Dwight ways, so if you have Howard and have thought about trading, this is the game to be off of to do it.  Here’s what else went down in a light slate of Thursday action:

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Anyone watch the Mavs host the Celtics last night?  Game be scrappy!  Rajon Rondo tackled Monta Ellis towards the end trying to restrain him for a hard foul, and I got confused if I was watching hoops or that MNF tragedy!  Ellis held his knee for a bit there, so let’s hope he’s OK…

But the big story in that one was Jeff Green‘s absurdity.  Well, it actually mimicked the absurdity of this game.  Down 30 in the second quarter, the Celtics somehow came back – in Dallas – to make it a nailbiter to the finish.  The Mavs took Jeff Green as seriously as fantasy owners this year, and he had one of his three monster games he’ll have this season.  35/7/2/1/2 shooting 14-28 including 5-12 from downtown.  If there was ever a sell high game, this would be it.  You need any data to back it up?  How about after his last big game – 39/6 with four treys against the Pelicans on March 16th, 2014?  The subsequent 8 games immediately afterwards – 11.8/3.6/2.3 shooting 34% from the field.  Green is Brandon Jennings in a SF/PF body.  They couldn’t even do a Freaky Friday remake with these two, they’d wake up and look at their new bodies in the mirror and go, “meh, at least I can still get hot one game outta ten shooting the ball…”

Green’s first two games were the expected blah, and he just doesn’t do anything but score and trey… Glorified ThrAGNOF!  Is Chris Copeland really that much worse than Jeff Green right now?  Maybe Citizen Copeland doesn’t have this kind of big game upside, but it’s why we preach to stream your threeballers.  Stream your polyorchids!  Learn something new every day here at Razzball… Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:

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What a night for the Brow!

On a near-unparalleled night for my bold call for MVP yesterday and Razzball’s #1 fantasy pick, I’ve gotta say, it feels like it’s going to be a great season!  An unbelievable 26/17/2/3/9 in a near trip-dub with the blocks, and fitting he’d be 2014-15’s first rainbow line (at least 2 Pts/Reb/Ast/Stl/Blk).  In H2H leagues, if you have Brow you better win blocks this week!  Not only were those blocks more than enough, but Brow was a solid 10-22 from the field (6-9 FT), and didn’t commit a single TO.  About all you could complain about is if you play in a triple-doubles league, he just needed one more swat!  Just one!

Of the 25 experts on FantasyPros, only 5 had Brow #1 overall with yours truly one of the five, and Razzball’s Seth a second.  Now, before you go unloading your top 5 picks for Brow in a desperate trade, don’t forget this was against the Magic who looked pretty horrific.  Then again, Stephen Curry and LeBron James are going to have to do something outrageous to make the Brow non-believers feel better tomorrow…

Here’s what else went down across the league’s first three regular season games:

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rcl-basketball-logo

Whoa, drafts are starting already?!  The early bird catches the predator!  Wait, I don’t think I got that right…  Getting a draft done early after all this rankings work was a liberating, yet headache-inducing experience. People have been looking at my ranks too much!  Razzball Nation is going to a tough customer in their fantasy leagues this year… If you’re itching to start a Fantasy Basketball league, we need more RCL commishes to host a league just like this one, so hop over and start and RCL League today!

Overall, I’m iffy on my first team.  I think I like it.  Has a little too much youth – but just how the draft went.  “Enough noodling, show us your goods!”  “What if my goods are a noodle!?”  Here’s how the draft went last night, and my pick-by-pick analysis below:

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With the full 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Rankings now complete, let’s take a look at the double digit rounds.  The debate over Scrub A or Scrub B.  We don’t want no scrubs!  Well, play in a shallower league then!  People say you win your leagues in the later rounds.  I don’t know who these people are, but they’re probably jaded after drafting Derrick Rose in the 2nd round last year.  Where’s the violins?!  What I would say, is if you hit on one guy in the late rounds with 30th or 40th overall value, you’re set.  75% of your last picks are probably going to be drops.  So 75% of your late picks will be passes to Brandon LaFell.  Wrong sport!  Still bitter about how bad he was… Go Kelvin Benjamin!  Aka my favorite Panther.  Stay focused!  Here’s my top 150 for the 2014-15 Fantasy Basketball Season (based on 9-cat H2H):

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As we head into August, now is a perfect time to take a look back at the free agency period for the upcoming 2014-15 NBA season.

While there is one big name yet to sign (Eric Bledsoe), a few less-intriguing options still on the market (Michael Beasley, Andray Blatche, Kent Bazemore, Jordan Crawford), and another who’s unsure whether he’ll play or retire (Ray Allen), most of the fantasy basketball world knows where guys will be playing this season.  Of course, that still doesn’t include the possibility of Kevin Love finding a new home by the end of the summer, but that could be the subject of an entirely different article.

There is little doubt in anyone’s mind that Love will land in Cleveland, which will make them a huge force in the Eastern Conference — and in the entire NBA.

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So one of my favorite Charlotte Hornets memories was Glen Rice winning the All-Star Game MVP in 1997.  I was still a chitlin, but even then I knew the Hornets were the epitome of small market (and moved just a few years later).  Rice seemed like a fill-in bench player (even though he was pretty nasty in 96-97 with a by far career-high 26.8 a game), but went absolutely bonkers in the ASG second half, putting up 20 in the 3rd quarter.  He was hotter than P.J. Hairston in a “yo mama” contest!  I knew the Hornets had no title aspirations (ending up getting swept in the first round), but it made the whole season worth it.

And the Glen Rices of the world now have another, well smaller, trophy on their mantle with Glen Rice Jr. winning the Summer League MVP.  Actually, I’m not sure if he gets a trophy… Maybe just a stack of $1,000 in Belagio chips… Either way, Rice put up a 6-game line of 25/7.8/2.3/2.5/0.5 boosted by a plain stupid 36/11/3/4/0 line with six treys last Saturday.  “Pretend every game is the All-Star game film I always make you watch, son!”  The Wizards boosted their wings (and headband usage) with Paul Pierce brought in, plus Otto Porter should see a lot of minutes off the bench.  But behind Bradley Beal, Martell Webster just had herniated disc back surgery leaving a big early-season gap for backup SG minutes.  Sure Garrett Temple might be able to fill-in, but off the hot Summer, I think Rice Jr. has got some minutes coming his way.  Plus one of the biggest concerns for Beal is his injury risk, so a deep-league gamble on Glenny Jr. could be an interesting flier.  Here’s what else has gone down with Summer League wrapping up and free agency moves:

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Thursday night’s Draft was as exciting as advertised.  Some of the top prospects we’ve seen come around in a while found homes amongst the NBA’s 30 teams — yet, there were very few surprises, outside of maybe Aaron Gordon getting picked No. 4 overall by the Orlando Magic.

Those of us expecting some big trades to go down were also disappointed.  There was really only one trade that didn’t involve a straight swap of picks or previously picked players, and that was D-League phenom Pierre Jackson getting shipped from NOLA to Philly for Russ Smith.

The big trade news around the league came a few days prior to the Draft when the New York Knicks and the Dallas Mavericks announced a blockbuster deal that sent Tyson Chandler and Raymond Felton from the Big Apple to D-Town in exchange for Jose Calderon, Samuel Dalembert, Shane Larkin, Wayne Ellington and two second-round picks, which ended up being Cleanthony Early and Thanasis Antetokounmpo.

Now, how does this affect fantasy basketball owners going forward?

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Perhaps the funniest catch phrase I made up with my buddies while watching the NBA through college -“Wahhhhhh I’m Jarrett Jack!” – can be used in so many instances.  It’s like Brian Dennehy’s speech about how versatile the F-Bomb is when he played Bobby Knight in an ESPN movie.  Whomever greenlit that idea, airing a movie with constant F-Bombs on ESPN2, is probably fired.  He’s like, “Don’t fire me!  Wahhhhhhhhh!  Wahhhhhhhhhhh, I’m Jarrett Jack!”  I use this phrase because every time I seem to watch him, he looks so so sad.  And just look at the cover screen grab for the Yahoo recap from the game last night!  So after Kyrie Irving flexed his guns too hard, Jack had three starts of very uninspiring ball.  Mike Brown sat him down and said he needed more from him.  The veteran responded, “Wahhhhhhhhh I’m Jarrett Jack!”   Then last night rolled around with the Knicks rolling out Raymond Felton to play defense.  Seriously, it’s like Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory with the blueberry chick.  The only difference is Felton actually ate the meals and didn’t chew the LSD-laced gum!  After a minute or two, Felton was winded, and went “Wahhhhhhhh, I have to guard Jarrett Jack!”  Jack lit up the terrible Knicks D for 31/5/10 with a trey and a side of whoopass.  Finally kicking it into gear as the starter, Jack has a four-gamer cooking up for week two of the playoffs, with my eye eagerly on Wednesday at the awful Pistons.  It doesn’t really matter who he’s playing, pretty much a must own.  Of course, in all my leagues where I’m still alive, he was already snatched up.  “Wahhhhhhhhh, I’m Jarrett Jack!”  Here’s what else I caught over the weekend in NBA action:

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Wait, what?!  Kobe Bryant is back?!  I mean, the Lakers beat the Thunder, and someone dropped 42 for purple and gold… I can think of no other scenario.  But as the verse goes, “Blessed are the Meeks!” Dropping 42 on OKC, Jodie Meeks hit a career-high with his typical Meeks game of treys and steals.  “He was hittin’ em from downtown like a mad scientist!”  I dunno, I was trying to come up with a good segway into Cosmos from last night, but got nothing.  “Went all deGrasse Tyson on the Thundah!”  “Gettin’ all cosmic on dem mfers!” The Lakers beating OKC definitely broke Vegas’ space time continuum.  Plus winning with 36 boards to 59?  Crazy town.  We’ve liked Meeks a lot over here in Razzball Nation, and somehow he’s still at only 58% owned in Yahoo.  I demand an Inquisition on this matter!  Even though he’s close to a ThrAGNOF, the 1.3 Stls a game, fairly high-volume 84% FT shooting, and just overall upside on such a crappy team make him an obvious must own.  Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in fantasy action:

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