Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there’ll be ThrAGNOF! Full disclosure – I had to look up this song from that movie about a weird looking ginger chick and it’s about coming of age or something. No, not Teeth! Last night, an injury-ravaged, de-taloned Pelicans went out and shocked the Clippers. Kevin Hart, apparently a big Clippers fan, got to travel with LA on a Ride Along I’m guessing. When Jamal Crawford upchucked a three at the buzzer for the win, that arced so high it might’ve hit the Cowboys Stadium scoreboard, Hart started crying when it barely hit rim and got angrier than his little cameo in The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Anyway – Anthony Morrow was a big factor in the upset win, going full-ThrAGNOF 27/5/0/0/1 with two treys. Scoring is the name of his game! Always a high-volume shooter, Morrow just has never stuck in a big role as he doesn’t do anything else. Dude, if he was on a D’Antoni Lakers team, he might break the NBA! With Brian Roberts with a bruised knee, Eric Gordon with an absence of knees, and Austin Rivers with the sniffies, the Pels were without three of their bigger remaining scorers. Looking ahead to tomorrow, the Pelicans get a beignet of a matchup against the former New Orleans Jazz and all three could miss again. So if you need some treys and a little scoring upside in the deeper leagues, it’s that time of year when the scrubs will come out tomorrow! Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Last night might have been an utter low for the New York Knickerbockers. Haha, yup they get a full name scolding like your mom used to do. Got shellacked by the Lakers by 31, in another horrific TNT Overtime fail. It’s funny that the Lakers were involved in another redonkulous blowout this month: One because the first was also on TNT OT when the Clippers beat them by, I dunno a million (?), and second because I had the following remarks on Xavier Henry, whom I call Wheels, three-ish week ago after that Clips blowout: “I dunno, I just have a weird feeling he is going to be fantasy-relevant even in shallower leagues in a few weeks because D’Antoni likes him. And why not give him minutes again on this team?” And that’s me quoting me! It’s been a little up-and-down, and Wheels is a bit of a ThrANOF, but 8-11 (3-4 3PTM 3-5 FT) 22/3/0/2/1 last night. Only 23 minutes (and oddly enough 23:20 exactly in the past two games), but mid-20 minutes seems about right the rest of the way. He can easily score mid-teens, get a couple swipes, and nab a trey for you. Jodie Meeks-lite, if you will. I think even in 12-teamers he’s worth a look right now for the remainder of the week with three games left on the slate that all are pretty saucy (@MIL, @MIN, PHX). And another 4-gamer next week with good matchups. I just picked him up myself as I hope to slip by the Slippery Squirrels in my RCL playoffs. Need more points and only up one in steals. Go JB HUMAN! Here’s what else I saw last night in NBA action:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oh man. Am I sorry if anyone had to watch Battle: Los Angeles last night. I hated that movie and actually would rather have watched that again than the atrocity in Staples. Reggie Miller was having so much fun dogging that game. I was saying that it was like watching an All-Star game at the office, then either Miller or Kerr then said the same thing! Followed by, “well, except all the All-Stars are on one team!” Lakers burn! El Burro, I hope you’re around, because I’d love a rant from this game from a true Lakers fan. Sure there have been worse NBA blowouts, but man, that was straight up Cornell going on the road to Wichita State. Even that would be a lot better to watch! I’m not taking much to heart fantasy-wise in the 48-point romp of blue/red over yellow/purple, but my main takeaway was that Kendall Marshall still got a 7/4/7 line in 24 minutes and Jordan Farmar was awful in his 21 minutes. I’m a big Farmar hater, and think Marshall is actually a little underrated right now. Marshall as we all know was playing well in big minutes earlier in the year, and I think can get back to the 30ish range. And even if he falls short of that, the dimebags will afloweth like a Denver dispensary. Cash cow business for the Girl Scout cookie industry as well! Probably should’ve had a few Girl Scouts paroling the Staples Center last night. “Eat your pities away, Lakers fans!” “A peanut butter delight won’t disappoint you at all!” Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oh man, it’s been a grueling season for a few of my fantasy teams. I’m like Oliver Twist out there. “Please, sir, give me some fantasy-more!” But it’s always nice seeing one of my boys go out there and have himself a career weekend, like Mike Scott who put up 20 on Friday then a career-high 30 on Saturday. #EmojiTats! In 30 minutes (he scored a 30 for 30) shot 11-14 including 6-7 from deep. Somebody step out on this guy! Reminds me of when the old UNCW coach would keep our hapless defense in zone when the opps were hitting threes. I remember when you were against us, Kent Bazemore! Oh man, I gootta elaborate more on that… Anyway, Scott went 30/8 with no other stats so it was a major-ThrAGNOF! And remember, ThrAGNOF isn’t derogatory unless it’s one of those high-ranked guys. Looking at you Klay Thompson. Scott got the start for Paul Millsap whose knee is all syrupy, and Scott could pick up another start or two early this week. Why you don’t need to draft threes! Grab your kilt, prep your best Mel Gibson, and ride with your fellow Scott against the Longshanks. Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The All-Star Break is here! With skills competish, Mike & Mike in the evening, and everyone’s favorite – the Slam Dunk Contest. It’s exactly what everyone needs during the grind of the regular season, even for us fans who are only nursing such injuries like Larry Drew-ophobia, general malaise, and fantasy bewilderment. I have all of those symptoms! Plus we all get four straight nights of not worrying about our fantasy rosters, nights off to spend with ladies (Valnetine’s Day just happens to be during the All-Star Break, who planned this? Does Jared own the NBA?!), nights off to go out drinking without constantly checking box scores on the iPhone, and nights off to spend working on some Fantasy Baseball rankings… Oh, and nights off to dig out our cars, sheesh this weather! So with all that in mind enjoy the All-Star Break, get on twitter and have fun faux-titling the Dunk Contest throwdowns, and I’ll be back on Wednesday next week as we approach the fantasy playoffs. Here’s what I saw last night in the few NBA games and a few injury updates:Please, blog, may I have some more?
So, the Feds are after you. Your Ponzi scheme and billions of dollars are up for seizure. Well, that, or your $20 league dues and your friends sending you obnoxious texts about how you’re not going to the playoffs. So if you’re in H2H and in this shortened week, what is a Madoff to do? How about putting in a quick grab of Chris Kaman, who has erected himself into surging fantasy relevance. Too far JB! A raging 25/14/4/1/3 line last night, taking a whopping team-high 24 shots. That’s now three straight games of at least 17 Pts, 8 Rebs, 3 Asts and 2 Blks. That’s the floor! While tonight’s slate is pretty jam-packed, Thursday is a light one. With the Lakers one of the few teams in action, Kaman could really make the difference this week for ya in Pts and Blks. While he does have a shelf life whence Pau Gasol returns, if Gasol is indeed traded I think Kaman has played well enough to stick. Of course you never know with Doh-toni, but Robert Sacre isn’t exactly a guy to be developed for a long-term future and they don’t have any other true 5s. So don’t be afraid to stash some of your free cash in the Kaman islands. While he is owned in 43% of Yahoo leagues already (a bit shocking to me it had hopped up that fast), there’s plenty of IRS-free banks left to stash him up. Here’s what else I saw last night across fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
So imagine you’re heading into fantasy hoops last night, wondering what the headline would be. You knock on the mansion’s door and Tim Curry is standing there all snippity-proper. You say, “Hey, Timmy, someone is gonna kill it tonight!” Could it be, Colonel Larry Sanders Mustard? Nope! His vision is too blurred to be the culprit. And no, it’s not because he topped off his third bottle of Cristal just to have another blunt weapon, it’s because he got poked in the eye! Could it be Reverend Jeff Green? No way, he had his big night a few games ago, we all know it’ll be at least another two weeks until another good one! So it’s surprise suspect #3, Professor Mason Plumlee, who went all Krzyzewki on the Pelicans leading the Nets in Pts Rebs Stls and Blks for a 22/13/0/3/2 line. Shot 8-10, 6-9 from the stripe, and made Anthony Davis lose a wee bit of hair on his Brow. “I’m supposed to be the high-flying big man in this game, Mason!” The crowd wasn’t chanting MVP for ya in this one! Awww, that’s mean. After playing under 12 minutes the previous two, Plumlee got 28+ in the past two games and productive in both. Keep Kevin Garnett at 13 minutes a game, Kidd! I think a good way to approach Plumlee right now is like James Johnson. Puts up solid stats all around (although a little less all-around than JJ) when he gets the minutes. I think he’s gotten himself to fringe 12-team worthy depending on your roster comp. Definitely needs to get scooped up in deeper. I think enough minutes will be there for him to fill in some Pts/Rebs/Blks. Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Lakers and dear ol’ coach Doh-toni are just an absolute mess right now. And just to make things even more interesting, there are injuries, mystery, intrigue, vets returning, and a scheme to divert water reservoir rights. With Pau Gasol out for two weeks with a bum groin and a good chance out of L.A. before the trade deadline, this whole team is turning into the end of Chinatown. “Forget it, Jake. It’s Chinatown!” And you really can forget pretty much everyone on this team right now, as three vets returned, two guys got hurt, and it’s turning into a bigger Hollywood disaster than The Adventures of Pluto Nash. I bet Norbit could play PF for the purple and gold! Since going through everything that happened for the crumbling Lakers would be an 800-word paragraph, let’s hop out of the open and machine gun through em, plus what else happened last night in the world of fantasy hoops:Please, blog, may I have some more?
But I had no idea that D’Antoni would behave like his fictional doppelganger (played by Powers Boothe) and that he would turn the Lakers into the Bella Union Saloon, a place rife with rigged gambling, card games that end in gunfire, out-in-the-open prostitution and inexplicable frontcourt rotations. OK, maybe just the last thing.
There really seems to be no method to D’Antoni’s madness. Jordan Hill got some serious run at the end November and responded with some double-digit rebound games, so of course coach slashed his minutes down to the high teens by the beginning of December. Around the middle of the month he called Hill’s number again, and the results weren’t surprising: He produced some nice games, including a 21-9-1 on Dec. 16 at Atlanta. Now Hill is starting, but his minutes have been crunched down to around 20 per game.Please, blog, may I have some more?
So the Pistons were looking like a playoff contending team with all their offseason acquisitions, but after a 2-1 record with the only loss a close one on the road to Memphis, the Pistons have dropped 4 straight to fall to 2-5. Plus Memphis looks god awful after that looking like a “good” loss. The Pistons aren’t very good. Hire Jim Leyland! The culmination of the four-game skid climaxed in an ugly 18- point loss to the Warriors last night that sent a few fantasy shockwaves down our fantasy spine. First Josh Smith was benched before playing 19 minutes and shot 1-6 for 2 Pts and no boards. That’s like a Robin Lopez line! He reportedly took some bad three-pointers. Those familiar with Josh Smith are like, “aren’t they all bad three pointers coming from him?!” Still think Smith will be fine and this could actually help him from killing your FG% on his off nights. The biggest benefactor to the J Smoove benching was my boyfriend (!) Kentavious Caldwell-Pope getting 24 minutes and going 9/3/1 with a trey and two steals playing a small (literally) forward role at times. Now I didn’t watch this game, so if he was matched up on Andre Iguodala who isn’t exactly a domineering 3, that makes sense. Then to top off a terrible night for Pistons fans, Razzball commenter favorite Andre Drummond went down with an ankle injury, playing way too late in the game that was a blowout. It was like a Booby Miles injury. He walked off the court under his own power, but ankle injuries are like the fantasy grim reaper’s wheel of fortune. Sometimes a terrible looking one turns into nothing, and sometimes you’re Tobias Harris. Hell Tyson Chandler walked off the court with a broken leg! You just never know… Keep your eye out for updates during the day. Hey, at least Drummond put up 16/14/0/3/3 for ya! Here’s what else I saw across the NBA last night:Please, blog, may I have some more?