PGs depth suddenly overfloweth from the wire, with a lot of guys on their choppers… chopping(?) their way onto fantasy squads.  Listen, I would make some sort of better parallel with that show, but I haven’t gotten to it yet.  Takes a lot of effort to plow through a show!  I friggin’ had to stop the new Arrested Development in season 4.  Yikes.  And speaking of arrested development, the Clips sure got a buster when Chris Paul went down with a separated shoulder Friday night, and through a series of updates will be out “up to six weeks.”  The trainer asked Paul if he was filing for divorce with his shoulder, but nah, just separated.  Huge blow to the Clippers, but it was a “rush to your nearest internet device” moment for fantasy owners to add Darren Collison.  On Friday night, in JB’s RCL 2 I missed out, then when deciding who to drop for him in RCL 1, I missed him by about 10 seconds.  Thank’s a lot Your Mom Says Hi!  A Hill ‘O Beans bout to be refried!  Yeah, terrible smack talk, I know…  If you’re not checking out the comments every night, all sorts of updates get fantasy spins throughout the evening, like El Burro breaking the news while watching his Clips’ title hopes get separated.  I like Collison a lot, and unless you singularly need assists, I like him over the other big breakout PG from the weekend.  I think he gives you 16/3/6/2 a game until Paul is done with marriage counseling.  The 35 minutes he’ll play a night should make those numbers pretty realistic.  Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in hoops action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Ahhhh weed jokes.  The Pacific Northwest.  Their team is the Blazers.  Rasheed Wallace used to play for them!  But I don’t think Oregon has legalized it yet.  What’s the world like in Colorado and Washington these days?  Something like Amsterdam?  Although, even though I went there, I hardly remember it.  If you have Damian Lillard though, you’re surely remembering the night he put up last night!  11-23 shooting, 8-12 3PTM for 36 points, a surprising 8 boards, and a dimebag right on the nose with 10 assists.  Plus a game-winner!  The near triple-double moves Lillard to 10th overall in Total Value according to Basketball Monster, and a true American Hero!  And by that, I mean my 19 overall rank of him got flack more than a few times through the rankings iterations, and looking peachy keen now.  He’s lowered his TOs almost a full turnover a game since his rookie year, upped the 3PT% and my favorite –  is becoming an elite FT% guy going 5.2-5.6 a night at 91.8% for the season.  Getting to the line and making em, pretty much the antithesis of Andre Drummond!  Hey o!  Oh wait, I mean, I’m jinxing Drummond, he’s the bast center in the world and will all the sudden shoot 95% from the stripe once he adopts the Barry granny shot… Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

All hail Trey Burke!  May all the inhabitants of the great Salt Lake City and all their respective wives rejoice!  And… the Jazz are still atrocious.  Poor Tyrone Corbin.  He’s got to fiddle with Burke, Alec Burks, John Lucas III and now Diante Garrett at the point.  Jerry Sloan got John Stockton.  Then Deron Williams.  It just ain’t fair!  In yet another Jazz loss moving them down to 1-12, Burke got 12 minutes even, going 11/1/1 with a steal and hitting a trey shooting 5-8.  Trey with the trey!  If only Deuce McAllister was an NBA player.   Deuce with the deuce!  Or if McAllister was a dunker, “Deuce with the upper decker!”  I had the unfortunate pleasure of doing highlights for my second Jazz game now, but it was cool to see Burke’s debut and I thought he looked pretty good.  His first NBA points were off a long rebound then coast-to-coast for a controlled, attacking floater.  Obviously he’s getting eased in and he’ll get more minutes – hippity-skippity to a few months back and I was bigger on Burke than anyone – but I’m not ready to go nuts and drop quality guys for him.  Of course it’s a case-by-case scenario, but I really wanted Burke to get tons of preseason work; instead he broke his finger and missed some really crucial development time.  For example, I think I’m still holding Patrick Beverley over him.  PBev is the Razzball “why can’t I quit you?!” fantasy asset.  Lucas III is obviously not a long-term solution, and while he’s in the mix, he didn’t look good last night but was the only guy that could hit any long balls.  Alec Burks looked awful, sure his line 8/1/1/1/2 is fine, shot 3-6 – fine – but racked up 4 TOs in 16 minutes.  Just looked bad.  Which brings me to Diante G, who I thought looked really good.  Garrett actually led the Jazz in PG minutes with 20, and racked up a 4/1/6 line with three steals and only 2 TOs (one late one was pretty bad, but the game was over) and played down the stretch.  Garrett was the only point who could create opportunities.  So it’s a little crowded with Burks’ potential wilting away and Garrett looking decent as a D-League gamble and could get run through the season.  I think Lucas III gets cut at some point and Burks plays strictly backup 2 minutes, but that’s just me.  It’s a mess.  Shocker, considering it’s the Jazz!  Here’s what else I saw last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Full disclosure: I’m getting killed in my first two weeks of Fantasy. The reason? I have 3 bench spots, filled by Wilson Chandler, Kobe Bryant and Tobias Harris. Am I dropping any of these guys? Nope. I’m cool, Daddio. Remember, good reader, that being down by a couple points early in the season will hurt, but dropping talented players for stop gaps can spell doom for your season. I’m betting smart money that these guys will kill it when they return, and were I to drop one or more, it leaves me to stream guys, gambling on good performances from players overachieving week-to-week. Dangerous.  But if you like to live on the edge, or you lost Tyson Chandler for 4-6, and are a man of action, not words, then take a look at these fine fantasy finds:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I always love when an off night (only 4 games yesterday) yields one of the best NBA games we’ve seen all year.  So many story lines, so many stars.  And more importantly – so much fantasy goodness!

I guess I shouldn’t have curtsied around it, but there’s no way Chris Paul doesn’t lead the NBA in assists this year.  I said in the first recap of the season he would average a bajillion assists and rack up double-digit dimes almost every game.  Score two for JB!  Averaging 12 a game equates to a bajillion, right?  John Stockton is deadpan staring me down right now. Creepy, Stockton!  Creepy… J.J. Redick will be a really underrated acquisition if the Clips indeed make a title run with how he helps space the floor with his movement and shooting, and while we all know Chris Paul is awesome, I’m already putting him as the #3 fantasy player right now, leapfrogging James Harden.

I lucked out getting last night’s only late game, making Yahoo highlights for the 137-118 Clippers win.  Pretty much everything played out like a video game.  Everyone was hitting 3s, the scoring was astronomical, the pace was like a Peyton Manning offense, and finished off with some late alleys for the icing on the cake.  Fantasy God #1 really got that L2 + Square alley working out by the end of the game; Fantasy God #2 just couldn’t quite time Harden’s 3-point shot release.  Wait, do they even need controllers?  We are the controllers!  Whoa, too much philosophizing.  Let’s just get this back on the rails and go over some of the news and notes from last night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

As a very fair skinned, freckly and tall guy (makes me closer to the sun) I have had my problems beating the heat.  One time in college (I went to UNCW so on the beach) I got burnt so bad on my legs it made me get shaky and more loopy than Joseph Gordon-Levitt. My friends thought I pulled an Ewan McGregor and snuck in some heroin. Suffice to say, I got some serious additional freckling on my calves.  With their long slender shape and pretty much invisible blonde hairs, I could pass them off as Lindsay Lohan’s legs.  Enough celebrity mentions already!

Unfortunately for the Celtics, St. Patty’s didn’t carry on into Monday night as the Heat led by LeBron James’ 37-7-12 (including this abuse of Jason Terry) were able to keep the streak alive at 23.  Although the city of Boston probably would have gotten blackout drunk again either way.  With no Kevin Garnett, the C’s gave another start to Jeff Green who exploded his green-ness on the Heat like Nickelodeon gak.  He was the Green Monstah last night, going for a career-high 43 with 5 3PTM, 7 Rebs, 2 Asts, 2 Stls, and 4 Blks.  Easily one of the best fantasy lines of the year for who is becoming a huge pickup for owners who nabbed him.  Speaking of getting nabbed, check out this guy nabbing a few boogers on national TV. Proves you can do anything if you have the charm. Just look at that wink with the debonair of Mark Harmon/Dennis Quaid.  I thought no more celebrity references!

Let’s take a look at what else went down last night across the NBA:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Every year, there’s a handful of guys that are waiver wire whores and bounce back and forth between owners for spot starts.  It’s like the freshman co-ed dorm; you feel entitled if you’re the first to have one of em riding your roster, but then you feel dirty if you claimed them next.  Enter Jarrett Jack, who before settling into his probable NBA 6th Man Award role, got run off the bench, then a few starts, but never those solidified minutes.  A shoulder injury a few weeks back had the last round of owners jumping ship, but since returning he’s finally ready for a long term commitment. So what if he gave rival owners a little handsy here and rub-a-dub there?  Time for everyone to lock him up Elizabeth Smart style.

Please, blog, may I have some more?