Why do deer like salt licks? It’s one of the longest pondered mysteries in the world. Ok, that’s not true at all after I asked Jeeves. According to Wikipedia (I know Mrs. Hanson, I can’t use it as a source but this isn’t a research paper, bitch) “A mineral [salt] lick is natural mineral deposit where animals in nutrient-poor ecosystems can obtain essential mineral nutrients.” Parallels! Those poor Milwaukee Bucks were having such nutrient-poor fantasy lines and highlights of late and just needed some salt to lick. Easy, “that’s what she said” guy (you know if you are). The Bucks had three plays in the Sportscenter top 10! Fantasy wise, Monta Ellis hadn’t scored 30 in 2013. Brandon Jennings hadn’t scored more than 11 in his last four games. J.J. Redick hadn’t scored more than 16 or hit more than 2 threes in a game for his new squad. And Larry Sanders hadn’t… Well he’s been playing awesome, and was awesome again last night. Let’s look at their lines and the rest of fantasy basketball’s noteworthy performances last night:
Please, blog, may I have some more?Alec Burks
I was waiting for the Orlando game to end for hours, then realized the final score was 78-61. 61 points? You may have been duped into thinking this was a women’s basketball score, and though I think Britney Griner could drop a double nickel on these flunkies, these were men on the hardwood, allegedly.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
On Saturday night, Eric Gordon made his season debut in impressive fashion, going for 24 points (5 of 13 FG, 12 of 14 FT), including 2 threes, plus 7 assists and 2 steals. As of early Monday morning, he is only 40% owned in Yahoo!
Please, blog, may I have some more?
Hellloooo Super Mario. Looks like Mario Chalmers ate himself a mushroom. Not one of those stupid poison mushroom that always annoyed the hell out of me or those shrooms that totally trip you out. I mean the one’s that give you that growth spurt. He’s totally taller out there on the court this year. Actually that might be because of the mushroom I ate. Anywhooo, Chalmers has really been impressive (7.4/3/6.6/2/0.4 with 1 3PM per game) as a bargain PG early in the season and looks to have found his niche in the ridiculous Miami offense. His niche? Pass the ball to all the ridiculously good teammate and hit the open 3 if it’s there. I think I could have figured that one out. Seriously though, I am absolutely buying him as a top 100 player. He won’t give you a ton of points, but the other stats will be there (including money steals). Think of him as a bizarro Rajon Rondo and a really cheap pg if you’re lacking assists and steals.
Please, blog, may I have some more?In non-NBA news, Kentucky defeated Kansas 67-59 to win the national title (and hopefully your bracket. Actually your coworker who picked teams based on mascots probably won it). Maybe Anthony Davis will finally shave off his playoff Unibrow… Hmmm playoffs.
Please, blog, may I have some more?The theme this season has been injuries. If you’ve been able to avoid them then you’re probably sitting real pretty right now as we go into the playoffs/end of the regular season. However, if you drafted Eric Gordon, Andrew Bogut, Danilo Gallinari, etc.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
This year’s fourth overall pick, Tristan Thompson, has some growin’ to do. He’s going to need to learn to distribute the ball at least a little better. In five games, he’s amassed two dimes. Two dimes in 10 days. That’s less than my great grandfather made selling a day’s worth of newspapers.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Stephen Curry‘s ankle used up its final sick day of the year, because unlike weak ankles themselves, sick days don’t roll over. (Boom! Nailed it.) Dwyane Wade? His left foot caused an early exit. Then a quarter later, his right foot told his left to stop being such a damn sissy, strap on an extra sock and get back out there.
Please, blog, may I have some more?
