Welcome back from Thanksgiving! After a week of indulgent eating, I’m back with an extra 20 lbs of writing weight. Those drumsticks went right into my index fingers. So I didn’t learn the typical QWERTY typing method, sue me! I taught myself how to type in “Olsen Twins Turn 18 Countdown” chat rooms when I was in middle school… Fantasy hoops had a ton go down through the Turkey Day holiday, although Omer Asik wasn’t traded to the Magic for Hedo Turkoglu. Now that would’ve been a Turkey Day! Of all the things that went down, I am positively giddy for the run Patrick Beverley is about to give us with Jeremy Lin set to miss two weeks with a knee strain. Thanks in part to Slim’s water torture, I’m a big Beverley believer for some real mulit-cat upside. Early returns started slow, with PBev going 7/2/2/2/0 the game Lin got hurt during the first quarter, then only 5/4/1/0/0 in 24 minutes on the Friday night. But on Saturday against the Spurs, 11/6/5/3/1 no turnovers and three treys. “Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about!” Thanks Maury Ballstein. Even though PBev isn’t a focal point of the offense, I buy the peripheral stats, and a must-have addition to your own “Balls Models” squads. Steals, boards a-plenty, with some dimes and out-of-position blocks will floweth like a river. Or Slim’s water torture device. You said you weren’t into S&M! This is my fantasy update writing of shame… Here’s what else I saw since we last checked in:
Anthony Davis – Would’ve been the lead if I hadn’t already written the open… It’s all the tryptophan… Making me lazy! Absolutely brutal injury for fantasy owners as he broke his hand last night. The fracture was non-displaced, which sounds better than displaced. When I played Operation, having anything displaced was never good… No official timetable has been released at the time of this writing, and I’d guess it’s at least 4 weeks.
J.J. Redick - Out 6-8 weeks with a broken hand and torn ligament in his elbow. Pretty much what would happen to Bilbo if the dragon made him give him a handsy. “Isn’t Redick a shooter and a guy who relies on his hands?” You sir, inner monologue, are correct! Yeah, he’s droppable in all leagues. What’s up with these brittle hands?! Jamal Crawford gets a minor boost, but he was getting run and shots anyway. I think the biggest boost goes to Darren Collison, even though Willie Green is technically starting and ignorable. Wow, ignorable didn’t get a red underline! I thought I made that word up… Collison should stay at over 20 minutes a night for some cheap scoring/diming in deeper leagues.
Brandon Knight - Whoa, look at this triple-double flirt! One of my big sleepers this year couldn’t get healthy, and is finally banking on some of what I hoped for with a 20/9/8 game with only 3 TOs and the Bucks actually won! And three straight games now he’s gone over 30 minutes. Should solidify his spot if there was any concern. He was spotted with some ice on his shoulder, but it’s better than having a chip on there! Be sure he’s owned in your league.
Derrick Williams – What the Shaq-ra-mento?! Got 32 minutes and a start in his Kings debut for 12/6/4 then 4/7 last night in only 22 minutes. What?! The Kings don’t play consistent rotations? Shocker! I think a new term I might try out is instead of saying “shocker” just yell “Wichita State”! You’ll have to let me know how that goes… Hey, the Kings are playing him and he has upside for the deeper leagues.
Kevin Durant - Double rainbow line! I think only the second on the year to Josh Smith‘s on Nov. 15 but I mighta missed one. I would think they’re extremely rare… Where’s Olajuwon and his quadruple-double?! 32/10/12/4/4 for probably the best slash of the year. Why he’s the King! Sorry Bron.
Martell Webster - Sure I’m quoting some ThrAGNOF stats, but 18+ with 4+ threes in 3 of the past 4 since we last checked in. But he boards and steals too and has a place on every roster… If only someone had loved him for oh so long!
Ryan Anderson - Hugo Weaving was watching his team’s stat tracker, and every time Ryan hit a three he grinned and muttered “Mr. Anderson”… He doesn’t really get that big a boost in value with the Brow out – he plays big minutes anyway and has his bum toe to deal with himself. But he’s been huge putting down 31 last night.
Victor Oladipo - Becoming “Mr. Multi Cat”. Or the name for that creepy old dude that lives alone in your neighborhood.
Michael Kidd-Gilchrist - Got the ol’ Plantar’s Peanuts. I mean Fascitis. Was able to return yesterday for 6/4/0/0/0. I’ve been holding out for him despite ups and downs, but I don’t like anyone trying to play through that kind of injury. Especially such a young rookie without a refined game. Droppable nearly everywhere now, I’m giving up. Waive the white flag. Flog the molly.
Andrew Bynum - Dude, he looks old slow and fat. Then when he gets into the paint he explodes. On the one hand, he kinda looks lazy any time he’s not down low, but on the other he looks like he’s able to manage he’s crappy knees. Got 30+ minutes and the first time over 23:27 all year for 20/10/3/0/5. I think he’s worth the gamble. As much as I don’t like him. But he’s an easy cut if he goes back down in either production or with injury issues.
Andre Drummond - You win Razzball readers… You win… Just a preposterous 31/19/0/6/2 line. In my defense, again no assists and shot 7-18 from the stripe – as both are black holes in his game. But with upside like that everywhere else, yeah, I was wrong to be shy on him. I was like a virgin at senior prom. Now I’m like David Duchovny at… a senior prom.
Jonas Valanciunas - Luminescent Lithuanian sighting! 18/11 with 3 blocks playing 37 minutes after only 17 last game. I tried to buy low and no one gave me the time of day. I was like, “camon I don’t have a watch!”
Chandler Parsons - His back is giving out. Maybe it’s from Monica riding him too hard. “Dude, you are so lazy can’t you get on top for once?!” Keep an eye on his status as an inactive may be coming at some point.
John Henson - Got a start!!!! Fantasy owners rejoice!!!! And ran with it, going 13/13/3/0/3 in his second-highest minute total of 34. I’ve been a big Henson believer through all the random iterations Larry Drew has been putting out there, and like Knight, should solidify Henson’s role off the W. Even if it did come at the expense of Ersan Ilyasova missing the game with a bum hammy. Henson should be owned in almost all leagues.
Pau Gasol - Getting an MRI on his ankle today. Shot only 3-15 yesterday and pulling the ol’ Gordon Hayward “I was injured!” The Lakers are so olddddd… Shawne Williams has some upside should Gasol miss any time and you need some depth. He hits threes, blocks, and has 8+ boards in the past three.
Trey Burke - Went for a career-high 20 in a Jazz win. The Jazz won a game…? Wichita State! 20/6/3/2. Starting to come together. 14+ shots in the past three as well, with two being wins. He’s like Rudy Gay, but a PG…
Jose Calderon - Missing games with a bruised ankle. “It’s only the tapas of my ankle!” Gal Mekel got a start going 6/7 but shot only 3-12. Still, in deeper leagues I gave you a Mekel radar sighting! A little surprising that Mekel got the start and 27 minutes to Shane Larkin‘s 17 off the bench, given it looked like Larkin had won the #2 PG role. Sure it’s only a bruised ankle, but Calderon has had injury issues throughout his NBA career and Mekel would be interesting even in 12-teamers should anything ever happen to Calderon long-term.
Andray Blatche – After a brutal game on Friday going 0-6, went for 21/8/1/1/1 with three 3s on Saturday. The Nets are so brutally bad, hurt and inconsistent that Blatche has to be believed a little bit. Even though in most leagues I’m in, I’m not exactly champing at the bit to grab him.
Tony Snell - I didn’t see too many games the past few days, but I watched Bynum’s Cavs and Snell’s Bulls Saturday night. His slash of 18/4/2/1/0 didn’t do justice to how good he looked out there. Two straight games of 3 treys and double-digit scoring, plus I think he can chip in the ancillary stats. If he’s not owned in 14+ teamers, use your team to fix it!
I’m sure there’s a million more notes to hit on, but now that we’re back to the daily sched, I’m gonna be back on em all! I don’t have highlights until Wednesday, but I’ll be breaking down all the action every day again and good luck in week 6!