“Is it safe?” Dustin Hoffman was so not type B enough in that situation. Imagine Jeff Spicoli in that scene. “Dude, what are you doing with that, man?!” But nothing beats the end when Hoffman makes him eat the diamonds. Spoiler alert! Oh yea, that’s supposed to go before the – – nevermind. Ryan Anderson last night was sure the marathon man in the triple OT slug fest in Chicago, playing a preposterous 57 minutes for 36/6 with 7 threes. He’s like a big Klay Thompson! I was actually texting with my friend who said the broadcast compared him to Larry Bird – Hah! I countered with the Jazz broadcast in their opener compared Alec Burks to Michael Jordan. I can’t even make something up more preposterous than that! These announcers must’ve failed those analogy tests you had to take through elementary school. “Pizza:delicious::ice cream:????” “Alec Burks!” While it’s good seeing Anderson get that kind of run, spoiler alert! I think his toe could flare up at some point. He’s playing great, no question, but when he came back from injury he said he was going to manage the pain and the Pelicans were hoping to hold back his minutes a bit. Sure failed last night! I’m obviously not his toe, but I’d be like, “Yo, Ryan, 57 minutes be too much and Tough Actin’ Tinactin ain’t gonna fix me!” I’m buying the nice Anderson stats right now, but think he’s a bit of a sell high and big dudes with big toes that have been big ouchies are big red flags. Here’s what else I saw from last night’s action and news in fantasy hoops:
Jordan Farmar – Had to get an ultrasound on his hammy because it was at least two seasons late. Will miss at least the next trimester, er, month. I think the takeaway is Steve Blake should see comparable value even when Kobe Bryant and Steve Nash (if ever) comes back, even if Blake’s elbow issue forces him to miss a few games. The Lakers are such a mess…
Paul Pierce – News broke after yesterday’s article was up that he’s going to miss 2-4 weeks with a broken hand. What’s with all these NBA players’ hands?! Soon they’ll be wearing gloves. But only on the non-shooting hands. Thriller! Andray Blatche becomes a very serious target to add for the next few weeks. Been pretty damn good.
Tyreke Evans – Continuing to multi-cat it up with 13/5/3/1 last night. Nothing too special but he’s been ridiculously consistent with 10+ Pts and 3+ Asts in every single game the past 10.
Jason Smith – Should be getting tons of minutes with Anthony Davis gone, and indeed got 47:01 in the 3OT game for 12/14. Of course the extra time helps, but he should be working into the Kosta Koufos realm of big man pickups these days.
Luol Deng – The past couple weeks after I hated on him he’s been a beast. Capped off with a redonk 37/8/7 night in the marathon. Now I want my back spinal tapped…
Taj Gibson – I really hate the Bulls. He is always whining. If it’s not him, it’s Joakim Noah or Carlos Boozer crying about something. Oh yeah, fantasy, ummmm, Gibby for 26/14 last night shooting 10-19 and 5 blocks on top of it. What the hey?! The 45 minutes was nutso too. But it is interesting Boozer played only 27 and in none of the OTs. Ya done Boozer! Gibson is actually worth a look in even deeper 12-teamers.
Kirk Hinrich – Got 11 assists in a ridiculous 54 minutes, but was otherwise awful shooting 4-15 and 0-8 from downtown. “Just pretend the hoop is Luol who you’re passing to!” But of course in Tom Thibodeau’s scratchy, hoarse, impossible to understand voice it sounded more like “fo2b 23founfo23 f ih3rrfhjf32 1indpij3fhaejf!”
Martell Webster – The dictionary quieted off for only 5/4 with a three. Still had 35 minutes so I’d hold.
Trevor Ariza – Uber-efficient 24/6/2/1/0 shooting 8-9 (4-4 3PTM 4-4 FT). The last thing that was that efficient was Gilbert Arena’s exit from the league.
Victor Oladipo – A day after I called you the “Multi Cat Man” the cats all disappeared! 13/6/2/0/0 with no threes. Eh, just one of those games.
Glen Davis – Was terrible. Even Charles Barkley didn’t want to waste a patented “turrible”.
Maurice Harkless – Near rainbow! About the only bright spot from the Magic last night. 16/4/1/2/2 in 29 minutes with a three. Still not a guy you can really trust as a must-own anytime soon.
Nikola Vucevic – And with there being no bright spots there was a big black spot, with Vuc spraining an ankle and needed X-Rays that were negative. Ankles, hands, and hamstrings, they’re killin’ the NBA! I think he sits at least one game, be sure to monitor.
Kawhi Leonard – Popppppp! POOOPPPPPP!!! What are you doing to us?!?!?! Another ridiculous 23 minutes and not much doing. This is getting to borderline “Remember the Alamo” territory. “Remember the Kawhi?! He was a beast last year!” And as long as the Spurs keep winning, Popp will have little impetus to change much. I’m still standing pat, but wouldn’t mind selling at somewhat of a discount.
Tim Duncan – By the roots of the tree of life, and the limbs of the beast of immortality a GOROMOTARO! Woooooo!!!! 23/21/2/1/2. A near rainbow Goromotaro at that. Wait. Isn’t Duncan supposed to be old and down the tube? Probably. Are his numbers worse than last year? Definitely. Did everyone expect regression? Definitely. Are the numbers after this game kinda close to where we thought regression might take him? Maybe… Although I will say I thought it was interesting this was only his second double-digit boarding night, which for a guy at 8.1 a night is a little odd. Maybe helping sink his value a tad since he’s always boarding 8 or 9 and we as humans like the double digits! And a great buy low in dub-dub leagues.
DeMarre Carroll – 17/8/2/2/0 for his third straight great multi-cat game and played the second most minutes for the Hawks last night in a tough matchup. He’s been a big “fantasy drinking game” guy (thanks allen!) that’s been added and dropped ad nasueum, but he’s worth owning in a lot of leagues right now.
Patrick Beverley – You know, you’d hope he’d hit one of those threes (0-3), but other than that I think this is the kind of line you shoot for going 8/5/4/2/1. It’s not the sexiest, but if this is around the median I am happy. PBev fa life!
Terrence Jones – Very tough game but I’m not panicking at all. Omri Casspi has a nice 30 minutes to Jones’ 18, but the Jazz play small with Richard Jefferson/Marvin Williams at the 4. Although if Casspi got 30 minutes a night it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Free Casspi!
Chandler Parsons – Sat out with the back. Or backed out with the sat. Nope, doesn’t work… Francisco Garcia got the start, and was typical Frisco except 4 blocks! 4 swats?! Crazy town.
Gordon Hayward – He can shoot! 12-18 29/5/3 in his first hot shooting game since that 1-17 disaster a couple of weeks ago started a slump. Welcome back!
Alec Burks – Trying to put his money where his – well, I mean the announcers’ – mouths are in banking on the Jordan comparison, going 21/3/4 shooting 7-11 and hitting 3 treys. He just looked so awful a few weeks ago that I’m not buying it as anything other than a guy that needs to be owned in the deepest of leagues.
Trey Burke – Looking pretty good! 21/6 on 9-18 shooting. If he hadn’t missed all that time, his rank would be looking pretty ballsy but decent where I had him way back when.
Paul George – Put up a 43-burger. Took effin’ 15 threes! Hit only 7, but monstrous night. Rejoice your stud! And hope he doesn’t break his hand like everyone else [knocks on wood, but not too aggressively!]!
I hope everyone had a strong start to their week and good luck in tonight’s games!