Ross can! Rosssssss can! Ross can get me the tickets! Somebody call the Police, because Terrence Ross is on fire! Or, ummm, do we call the Mounties? I plain just don’t know… But if anyone (aherm, me) had to feel the Sting of that 51-point outburst against them – out of so left field from Ross that it was out of the Pacific Ocean – then you’re certainly sending a message in a bottle to the fantasy gods asking “Whyyyyyy?!” 51/9/1/1/0 shooting 16-29 and hitting 10 Harvey’s Trays. “What’s with the sit-com references today JB?!” Yeah, no one will get that last one… Sit-coms are always fun, light, and don’t end on Sunday nights with me throwing things. “Enough about you, JB!” Damn, commenters are angry this morning! DeMar DeRozan sprained his foot in that game, and while Ross was already hot, no DeRozan helped him get hotter. “Hansel is so hot right now.” DeRozan looks like he’ll miss at least a few games – already not traveling tonight – making Ross a must-own for this week and the immediate future. The Raptors are all the sudden with 18 less shots a game (no, that’s not me throwing out an arbitrary number, that’s really DeRozan’s FGA a game!) so this is a great opportunity for Jonas Valaciunas as well to go on a solid run. Will be an interesting game tonight at Brooklyn to see how the two younguns perform. Here’s what else I saw over the weekend in NBA action:
Carmelo Anthony - Friday seems like a Justin Bieber DUI ago, when Melo put up 62. Followed it up with 35 last night. That’s barely half as good. Drop him immediately.
Dwayne Wade - So weird not seeing a DNP next to his name… 8/3/5/1/0 shooting 3-8 in 24 minutes off the bench yesterday. Sorry hopeful Razzballers, can’t put a buy low label on him. But he still has to be owned in most leagues, just too much upside when he plays. That line last night wasn’t great, but for a first game back in a little while, could’ve been worse…
Mario Chalmers - I had a big flip flop on Chalmers: didn’t buy his hot start, then told everyone he was the guy to own when he got hurt vs. other fringe PGs. Everyone is too busy living in the now! 16/1/7 shooting a very efficient 6-8 and 2-3 downtown.
Ryan Kelly - The baller from Whoville was the baller from Pooville yesterday. They’re not all high-brow, folks! 5/1/2/0/0 only playing 21 minutes. Did get into a bit of foul trouble, but yeah, perils of Doh-toni…
Nick Young - Started. And sucked. Moving on.
Manny Harris - 18 points?! What in the world?! 6-9 (2-3 3PTM 4-4 FT) in only 19:20 and did what the Lakers hoped Nick Young could be. Efficient.
Raymond Felton - 8-10 shooting in a heat check game. I just checked it again. It has high blood pressure.
Tyson Chandler - 13/14 dub-dub. Will have to get a dub-dub every night for the Knicks to have any sort of big-man presence. BREAKING NEWS – The Knicks sign Godzilla. Doh-toni remarks the new signee has character issues.
Tobias Harris - Goromotaro! From such an unexpected source… 28/20/4/1/0 on Friday night then 17/9/1/0/0 last night. Imagine if he was healthy all year… But based on the above I’m only imagining dragons…
Tyreke Evans - Imagine if his ankles weren’t held together by toothpicks! 23/7/7/2/1 taking over in the second half yesterday. What did Charlie Brown say to Pig-Pen? “You ‘Reke!”
Anthony Davis - I’m probably going to have all low picks in snake drafts next year, and never have Anthony Davis on a team of mine… ever… Ugh. 22/19/3/2/7 in a near Goromotaro and baller Rainbow Line.
Markieff Morris - The streak be goin’! 27/15 last night and absolutely on fire the past 6. Gotta be owned when hot.
Gerald Green - Is not hot. 4-14 yesterday after 3-8 Friday and 2 for his last 12 from deep. Just pretend it’s a really long dunk!
Sideshow Varejao - Gave everyone a scare when he hyperextended his knee, but was actually able to return. Shot awful but yet another double-digit boarding game. May miss a game depending on how the knee holds up.
Andray Blatche - Playing pretty well right now… I’d even say better than Tristan Thompson… But just for right now… 17/4/1/2/2 in a near rainbow in 25 minutes. Guess who didn’t have a near-rainbow? Hah.
Deron Williams - 7/7/7/2/0 in 35 bench minutes to Shaun Livingston‘s 23 minutes. Yeah, he’s the starter again-ish.
Rajon Rondo - Looked like old Rondo-ish. 13/8/8 but 6 TOs and it wasn’t a 10-ast game! Arghrghrghrgh. Love the 31 minutes though.
Phil Pressey - Listen, I’m not unimpressed with his play, just unimpressed with the situation. 18 minutes last night (while not doing much) and Jerryd Bayless is only a game or two out from returning as well. Just not a fantasy option except in 20-teamers.
Kentavious Caldwell-Pope - Another three and 4 steals last night. He’s a poor-man’s Jodie Meeks. And by poor, I mean a Detroit dollar vs. a San Jose dollar.
Detroit Pistons - Had no blocks, I repeat, NO BLOCKS last night! What the hey? A team with Josh Smith and Andre Drummond couldn’t stuff any of the old-man Mavs? Thought that was funny. Long live the Mavs in mid-to-long range!
Devin Harris - Speaking of old man Mavs, Devin Harris is still in the NBA?! 14/7. I am of course kidding, I said I thought he’d be useful in the deep leagues when he got back on the court and he’s looking like a solid role player. That role? Dumbledore.
LaMarcus Aldridge - 2/14 from the field cost me a category against Slim. I can’t really complain, he had a 44-point game, but Ross had a mother F 51 point game, so I will complain!
Thomas Robinson - Reminded everyone what he could do if he ever got minutes. One of my worst calls last year was thinking T Rob would have an impact on the Rockets. You’re reading this now, like, “he played on the Rockets last year?!” Exactly! 5/11/1/1/1 in only 15 minutes last night.
Stephen Curry - I’ve heard he’s OK at basketball. Sat right behind him at a Davidson game a few years back! I should’ve asked him to sign my cleavage… 38/7/8 with 5 treys in a nasty line. Sunday send-off! Hopefully it won some people their matchups.
Klay Thompson - ThrAGNOF poster boy! His Jan average line, if you don’t look at points, are xx/2.1/2.2/0.6/0.3. Sure 18.1 a game and 3.4 treys are nice, but the FG% is no help, and the 87% FT shooting doesn’t much either when it’s only 1.3 a game.
Evan Fournier - Brian Shaw needs another Shaw-Shank Redemption. Only 15 minutes for The Virgin while Randy Foye shoots 4-13 and 2-9 from deep. I just really don’t like Foye that much. Gimme Frenchy!
Derrick Williams - Ya know, I thought he’d do more, but uber-efficient 12/8/0/2/1 shooting 3-5 and 6-7 FT. Could’ve gone worse, rough first game, better here. Tough defenders on him too going against Paul George and Wilson Chandler in these past two starts. DeMarcus Cousins and Rudy Gay are still out, so Williams I think has a good one tonight against the Jazz. Don’t sleep on that D from Richard Jefferson! Hahahahahaha. But seriously, a great stream spot tonight, last time I emphasized a must-stream it was C.J. Miles going for 30 some-odd points with 10 threes. Not to gloat or anything! A little risky since Williams got hit in the mouth last night and might be questionable until near-tip, but I think he plays. Obviously I recant the must-stream if he’s out. Duh.
Marcus Thornton - Dropped 42 on Friday. If Terrence Ross didn’t go all nutso on us Saturday, probably would’ve been the “What the hey?!” award of the weekend. He’s always been a good shooter when on (“thanks – that’s really telling me something JB!”), but the 8-13 last night (19 Pts) without even hitting a three has me lifting an eyebrow. Didn’t need to rely on 15 three-point shots like Friday! Probably snatched up in deeper leagues, but worth a speculative start in 14-teamers or deeper tonight. Not the official stamp like Derrick Williams has though.
Joe Johnson - People were going nuts on his little hot streak, and now with Deron Williams back, cue the swan dive!
Mirza Teletovic - What was with all these crazy high-scoring games from out-of-nowhere over the weekend!? This one from Bosnia! Got 34 on Friday, shot 12-18 including 7-11 from deep, then returned to scoring only 9 shooting 1-6 from deep yesterday. “He’s a good shooter when he’s on!” Haha, what a crutch axiom. So funny. Even this dude is a good shooter when he’s on! Going to become a catchphrase for me, too fun.
Nicolas Batum - Ruh Roh. Set to get an MRI on his foot today, was already playing with a jacked up finger, and had a very rough 5/3/3 game last night as the Blazers got blown out. I’d want to see what the MRI results indicate first, but after that he gets a nice buy low stamp. If he misses a game, it might open the window for C.J. McCollum to get a lot of work. El Burro is so pumped! But it might only be one game, as the Blazers only have matchups on Tuesday and Saturday this week…
Jeff Teague - Another buy low. Turned his ankle, already ruled out for today, but I think he’ll be fine. It’ll be a dirt-cheap buy or even a waiver-wire add. People be hatin’!
Archie Goodwin - My long lost love averaged 29.5 in two games in the D league, and got called back up to keep his bench spot warm. Encouraging for his very deep league dynasty prospects. Like on my team… Bookend with things only about me! I hope Leo will come out of nowhere to bring me down a peg or two…
I hope everyone had a great weekend, and good luck in week 14!