Don't be shellfish...Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+

LeBron James set the season’s scoring bar at 51 points against the Orlando Magic last night. And while he also grabbed 11 boards and doled out eight assists, I refuse to be impressed until he also makes balloon animals for the kids at halftime. And maybe that’s a bit stubborn of me. Perhaps a big ol’ cooler full of Haterade is being dumped on my head here, but you don’t understand. I predicted this guy was going to average 28/6/6 before the season started and he’s making me look quite the fool averaging 27/7/7. Man, I was way off! I’ve got a rep to protect, Bros (and six Brosephines!), I can’t just go around giving props to a guy who is clearly better than everyone else in the league. When Kevin Durant has a game like this, he makes it look hard. When Chris Paul has a game like this, he makes it look like a struggle. When James has a game like this, it looks so easy you get pissed at everytime he doesn’t score 50. A 22/8/9 game seems like he’s 3/4-assing it. I’m not even sure if it’s possible to 3/4-ass something, but if anyone can 3/4-ass something, it’s one full ass like LeBron James. Still, you’re not playing fantasy nice guy, (Tom Hanks is my first pick!) you’re playing fantasy basketball. Time to respect … some more.

Here’s what else I saw in fantasy basketball yesterday:

Ryan Anderson – Shot a cool 3-for-10. Not cool like pompadours and Beetle boots. Cool like wearing sweatpants to your first day as a high school freshman, which is to say – not cool. Still though, Anderson’s three made shots were all treys. That counts for something. Besides nine points, I mean.

Andrew Bogut – Missed his second straight game with a knee injury, which is not the injury I had in my Why Bogut Misses Games This Season office pool. I had the “rickets” and “mono” boxes. Anywho, he’s expected to return over the weekend.

Ersan Ilyasova – Snare Yo Saliva’s averaging 31 mpg in his last seven along with 16.7 ppg/6.9 rpg/1.7 spg and a .562 average from the floor. Slurp it up, snitches!

Carlos Delfino – The Delfino Line™ was 20/8/5, with five steals last night against the stat-floozy Warriors. His field goal percentage isn’t quite there yet, but his minutes are. Leagues deeper than 12 teams ought to have snapped him up three games ago.

Brandon Jennings – Cold shootin’ since return (8-of-32, .250). Although it’s hard to tell what’s rust and what is Jennings’ naturally atrocious shot selection, like deciphering John Mayer in a roomful of a-holes.

Luc Richard Mbah a Moute – 15/19/5, with two steals in 41 minutes. Get out your mechanical pencil (Dixon Ticonderogas are for chumps!) and a pad of paper and copy down this a Moute pro/con list along with me. Pro: He’s played 40+ minutes two games in a row. Con: … ‘Cause Bogut’s been injured those two games. Pro: This was the third best game of his career. Con: There’s almost no  chance he approaches these numbers again this year. Pro: His face appears on the currency in Cameroon. Con: No, seriously. Bogut will probably be back Saturday. Con: You didn’t stram him last night. The cons have it!

John Salmons – Two games since returning from injury and he’s played a total 32 minutes and shot 2-for-12. If you still own him, bench him until he gives you a reason not to.

Stephen Curry – 16/5/5, with seven turnovers. I know the H2Hers scoff at TOVs, FT%, and low-brow Natalie Prtman rom-coms (probably), but 16/5/5 ain’t good enough to outweigh those tovs.

Richard Jefferson – 18 points, four threes. I don’t own Jefferson in any of my leagues and, frankly, I hadn’t been paying any attention to him. He’s scored 18 in two of his last three games. He’s not the worst 12+ team league option out there, though he might be the most boring. Honestly, are any of you Jefferson owners, happy to have him?

George Hill – After gearing up a bit in December, he took a half-step back in January and a full-step so far in February (9/2.5/1). This might not be Hill’s year, but something tells me San Antonio won’t look like this next year, which makes me think 2011 is Hill’s year. One of these years will be Hill’s year. Come Hill or highwater.

Andrew Bynum – Returned from injury. Ended with a line of 10/10/6, with three blocks. For him, that’s still injured. Get him in your lineups.

18 Responses

  1. gregsauce says:
    (link)

    I’ve got Jefferson in a 16-team H2H league. Drafted him late and it’s paid off pretty well. Then again, it’s easy to be excited about Jefferson’s production when you’re also rostering guys like Manny Harris, Keyon Dooling, and Jodie Meeks…

  2. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @gregsauce: Hehe. Good point.

  3. Larry says:
    (link)

    Beno or Jrue ROS?

  4. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @Larry: Jrue.

  5. Larry says:
    (link)

    How would you break this trade down: I give Jrue/Jennings/Mcgee and get Baron/Pierce/Tyson.

  6. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @Larry: You’d be giving up the 4th, 5th, 6th-best players in this deal and getting the 3rd, 1st and 2nd-best players in return.

  7. Larry says:
    (link)

    Would the deal be even sweeter if i could throw Calderon in instead of Jrue? thx for your help.

  8. jordo says:
    (link)

    i’m 6th in a 12 team league, hurting primarily for boards and points (which I’ve pretty much punted on); excelling at 3s, blocks and assists.

    i got an offer for bargnani and hinrich (whose been on the bench lately) for garnett and salmons.

    should i pull the trigger or pass?

  9. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @Larry: Nah. I like Jrue more than Joe.

    @jordo: If you’re getting Cagey and Salmons, yes. If you’re giving them, no.

  10. cplat says:
    (link)

    You see any need to change my team. 10 man H2h
    Guards
    Nash, Steph, Felton, Collison
    Forwards
    batum, Lebron, G-Wallace, Iggy
    Centers
    D-12, Noah, Brand, Camby

    Holding down third currently, but see that changing when my team becomes healthy

  11. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @cplat: Solid team. If you’re itchy, I might see if you can parlay Felton and Batum into a 3-point shooter like Gordon or Martin. With Felton’s FG%, you can afford to take someone like Martin and still raise your shooting averages. Also, with LeBron and Iggy, you can afford to lose the assist numbers.

  12. roddy buckets says:
    (link)

    It sounds like Billups is going to stay put at this point. Is it time to drop Lawson in a 12-team h2h? Available players: rudy, psycho T, john ringo..err..i mean..paul george, mayo, eyenga, barbosa, perkins, george hill

  13. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @roddy buckets: Meh. Maybe either of those Pacers or Perkins (depending on need).

  14. cplat says:
    (link)

    @Adam:

    I was thinking when camby comes back to package him and batum for Dorel Wright or Kmart. THen going to pickup Deandre Jordan? basically punting FT%, but if i landed Kmart i could probably compete there as well???

  15. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @cplat: If an owner is desperate for a certain stat, you might get away with trading the dual Blazers, but I wouldn’t trade Wright or Martin for those two. I really think you’ll need better bait than Camby and Batum. Either one of those guys would be better sidekickers.

  16. Larry says:
    (link)

    Adam, would you drop either Foye or Lawson for Afflalo?

  17. Gerald says:
    (link)

    @Adam: Christian Eyenga has been playing really well. Over his past 6 games, he has averaged 0.8 3PTM, 1.5 STL and 2.2 BLK, very good production in the rare categories.

    For the remainder of the season, would you drop someone like Rudy Fernandez or Omri Casspi for Eyenga?

    12 Team H2H league

  18. Adam

    Adam says:
    (link)

    @Larry: I’d drop him for Foye, once Gordon returns.

    @Gerald: Casspi will probably remain the most constant, but none of them are likely to play evenly ROS. I’d feel free to drop RuFer or Casspi now, while Eyenga’s hot.

Comments are closed.