With thousands of fantasy teams floating hither and yon, there’s bound to be one out there that started Bogut, Camby, Jeff Green, Brooks, Nelson, Martin, Carter, Delfino and Harris. To that team I ask, can I interest you in fantasy hockey? Bogut, Camby, and I think even Scottie Pippen again all dealt with migraines like they were twin sisters going through their cycles at the same time. Delfino tweaked his neck, Harris tweaked … something and everybody else tweaked their damn ankle. What? They haven’t developed a weight regimen focusing primarily on the ankle? If nothing else, I’d use several rolls of tape on those bad boys so that it looked like I had Popeye’s forearm spilling out of the tops of my shoes.
The two biggest ankle injuries befell the Rockets’ backcourt. Both Kevin Martin and Aaron Brooks missed the end of Saturday’s nail-biter with some form of ankle injury. Martin’s injury wasn’t bad, he returned on Sunday, but Brooks’ ankle x-rays came back negative, which is usually a positive, but, as he looks to be out at least two weeks, it’s still a negative. If you have a replacement, I might use him in weekly leagues this week, aim for Ishmael Smith, Courtney Lee, and Kyle Lowry in that order. Move Lowry up as soon as he’s given the green light to play.
Here’s who what else went down this weekend in fantasy basketball:
Jameer Nelson – Rolled his ankle, but his 12.5/5.5 line made him lame long before this injury.
Brook Lopez – So far, Bropez is averaging 18.8 ppg just like last year and 1.7 bpg just like last year. From that point of view, it’s an even flowpez. From a rebounding standpoint, his average is belowpez, having dipped from 8.6 to 5.7. Oh, nopez!
DeJuan Blair – In the first five games of the season, DeJuan has averaged just 4.6/6.8 in 23.8 minutes per game, a significant per minute drop-off from last season. I’m sure by now Tootie and Ms. Garrett have both dropped Blair, it’s time you do the same.
Gilbert Arenas – He returned this weekend and has averaged 15.5 points on .385 from the field in two games. The shooting if awful, but at least it comes with 1.5 steals and 3.5 treys. Gilbert can climb on that the way Q-Bert climbs on blocks.
Andre Iguodala – Wore a suit to the game for the first time in 252 contests. He’s day-to-day with a bum achilles, but should return once his heel gets a shower, a warm meal, a job and a roof over its head. His heel should be back on its feet Wednesday against the Thunder.
Evan Turner – Played a career-high 35:17 in Iguodala’s absence and grabbed 10 boards on the way to his first career double-double (14/10/3). It’s all math, really. A + B = See? I told you Turner wasn’t going to be a waste all season.
Jrue Holiday – 8.6/3 in his first three games, 18.3/8.5 in his last four. Jrue story. No, seriously. This is his story. Or if you’re a Michael Jackson fan, HIStory.
Kevin Love – Should be averaging 22.5/15.5 in 36 minutes. Instead, Love has only cleared 30 minutes once (30:54) due to the awfulness of his team.
Nikola Pekovic – Had his first career dub-dub in just under 22 minutes and is averaging a Per36 of 14.5/7. Doesn’t matter. Rambis much prefers to give Darko his 20.5 minutes to earn his three points.
Darrell Arthur – Left Saturday’s game with a knee injury that occurred despite no one touching him. He must have realized that there were still a few fantasy owners who hadn’t dropped him yet and this was his gentle reminder to do so.
Anthony Randolph – 3/4 in 12 minutes. I also got chills when the camera showed Randolph on the bench with Eddy Curry sitting behind him. Don’t let this be your future Ant’ny.
David Lee – From a disappointing Knick we move on to a disappointing ex-Knick. The General has only averaged 12.2 points on .406 shooting from the floor. I’m actually comforted by the FG%. He’s cold, learning a new offense with a new set of characters. He’s shot over .550 in his career and that won’t just go away this season. If he were averaging 12/11.3 and shooting over .500, that’d be bad news. Crack a beer, put on your slippers and relax.
Charlie Villanueva – Chuckles Newhouse is averaging 14.3/5.5 with 2.3 treys over his last four games. He won’t average 32+ minutes per game unless there is a major injury to Daye or Monroe. Assuming that doesn’t happen, you’re getting his ceiling.
Steve Nash – 19/5/15 in Phoenix’s win. Finding Nash Sunday evening with this line was like Scout finding Boo Radley in the corner of Jem’s room.
Robin Lopez – Seven points and one assist with no blocks in over 19 minutes of action. I didn’t see this game, but I’m assuming his arms were Cra-Z glued to his hips and he caught the one rebound with his nose like a seal. Don’t tell me the way it really happened, just let me have that image. Are the Lopez brothers in a Razzball league where they each own themselves? These dudes are 7-feet-tall! They’ve grabbed a combined six rebounds in their last two games.
Derek Fisher – Has scored in double digits in five of the first seven games this season. So … did they sign Steve Blake to serve as Fish’s pace horse. Just keep in his peripheral and he’ll gallop like the wind! Um, 10 ppg for a 36-year-old man counts as “the wind.”
Marvin Williams – A bone bruise on his right knee has forced him to miss the last two games. Deep leagues should hang on, shallow leagues never should have grabbed ahold.
Jeff Teague – Averaging five assists in his last two games after averaging 1.6 in the first five. He has a pulse, but the defibrillator is still nearby.
Kevin Garnett – He shot .300 percent from the floor and was a team low -4 for Boston. I don’t want to say he was a team cancer … which is why I typed it.
Serge Ibaka – 8/11 with a steal in almost 37 minutes. He has so much promise, but the knock was that he would have a rough time getting minutes. Jeff Green went down, Serge gets his minutes and that promise ain’t there. I guess no one made him cross his heart and hope to die-baka.