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The Finals are here (well for RCL and most standard H2H leagues)!  And if you’re like me, and you didn’t have Kevin Durant or LeBron James on any of your teams and got knocked out, it’s baseball time!  Shameless plug!  Starting next Monday, you can check out my Pitcher Profiles if you’re about to hopscotch to baseball as well.  To those of you still in your fantasy basketball playoffs, I HATE YOU!  Haha just kidding.  It was a whirlwind of sports going on over the weekend: rounding out my baseball drafts/opening night, whittling down to the Final Four in March Madness, Hank Dobson’s Mini-Mart and Country performing on the uneven parallel bars in the Independent Nations Games.  A wild time.  But what sparked my eye, or ruffled my gander, or something like that the hardest was D.J. Augustin going career-high on us with 33 Pts.  Ended his night with a 33/1/3/1/0 line shooting 10-14 (3-4 3PTM 10-10 FT) in a %s dominatrix.  My safe word is “gimme more assists!”  A huge Sunday sendoff and a big bounce back from that Turd Ferguson earlier in the week against the Pacers.  He’s a guy I bet a lot of scuffling teams dropped while streamboating in the playoffs and should be owned in your title run.  Not to be confused with your “tittie run”, which might be the most enjoyable 5K anyone could come up with it.  Here’s what else I saw over the busy weekend in NBA action:

Razzball Basketball NCAA Bracket Pool - Well, look at you matt.  You’re all blued out and raging everywhere.  “No I’m afraid I just blue myself…”  Since I have Florida as do the other highest scorers, it looks like this is your win.  Have fun naming my RCL team next year!  Nothing inappropriate, this is a family site.

Pau Gasol - Misses another.  “It’s our nausea!”  While one dude who’s bald steps in, Jordan Hill fades into obscurity yet again.  I’m glad baseball is here because I am bummin’ on hoops hard.

Chris Kaman - Kaman in my pants!  As I recall it was a horror film… Redonkulous ownage of the Suns lack of strong interior D for a career-high 28 Pts (which surprised me since he’s had an All-Star year in there).  28/17/6/0/0 shooting 13-19.  No update on Gasol’s status, who was officially ruled out last second.  So it’s going to be really hard to steadfastly recommend any of these three against the Blazers tomorrow – gun to my head, I’m first going to poop in my pants then say Kaman.

Kevin Love - Still posted a decent 14/9/3 line, but after the game he said he was exhausted.  Yeah, of losing!  Regardless of his subtext or lack thereof, it doesn’t bode well for a team out of the playoff race.  Cross your fingers a DNP doesn’t sneak in there.

Anderson Varejao - Hurt his shoulder sliding into second. Dammit!  I mean trying to dish the ball.  What’s he doing trying to dime!  Get under the basket, Sideshow!  Probably will miss time and is easily cuttable in virtually all formats.  Shocker!  Varejao hurt again…

Tristan Thompson - Slim’s kryptonite for 12/16/1/2/0 yesterday, seeing his minutes top 30 after five games under.  No Varejao should mean some rebound gluttony from TT double-cat.

Draymond Green - Another solid multi-cat line that is staying under the radar.  4/5/1/1/3 in 32 minutes, but while the Warriors are banged up he’s gonna keep getting the minutes.  Those numbers won’t carry you, and the Warriors play M/W/F on very busy nights, but just a thought for Sunday if you need a multi-cat boost to end your week.

Robin Lopez - 9/10/1/0/3 and I lost in one league by one block.  I guess that’s fantasy karma for ya…

Markieff Morris - While not getting banged on by Chris Kaman, 16/12/1/3/2 in a near-rainbow sizzle-fest.  Must be good to come off the bench when Miles Plumlee is the starter!

Kent Bazemore - I lost by 5 FGM in a league as well, so Bazemore’s 12/6/5/2/1 near-rainbow means nothing to me!  Chuck up more shots!  “It’s not all about you, JB!”  Shut up!

Kendall Marshall - His minutes the last three games are more variant than Mel Gibson’s mood swings.  28 to 15 to 37 in a ton of run last night, notching a dimebag.  My next toilet paper choice will be something in purple and gold.

Jared Sullinger - Sully!  At least this call came through.  Wasn’t huge, but 16/10/2/0/1 with a couple of treys.  Three straight pretty consistent games while being usable for a good stretch again.

Joakim Noah - Fantasy MVP!  Like I said in the open, if you didn’t get KD or King James, you were fighting an uphill battle all year.  Noah might end up being the fantasy MVP considering he was third roundish I believe.  13/8/13/1/1.  Beastmode.

Jonas Valanciunas - Wellllllll maybe I got this one wrong.  Peril of seeing a few games and observing something that may have been changed.  I think his back was jacked up for a while, and it’s finally stretching out.  20/9/0/1/1 shooting 6-8 and 8-8 FT.  That’s the kind of line he was putting up late last year that made me love him!  What a disaster trying to figure out the Luminescent Lithuanian this year.  It’s been a Larry Drew enigma.  I’ll rank him exactly at 100 next year, and when he does something good I’ll say “at least I had him in my top 100!” and when he’s bad say “well, had him just outside my top 100…”

Rajon Rondo - Solid yesterday, sitting today.  Still should give you three starts and at least tonight is a busy-un.

David Lee - Still can’t run on his balky hammy.  I wouldn’t be surprised if he misses all but maybe one game this week, and that’s optimistic.  Hopefully by mid-week he can be like Val Kilmer in Real Genius.  “Do you run?”  “Only when chased!”

Jarrett Jack - Wahhhhhhh, I’m Jarrett Jack!”  Every time.

Kevin Durant - Why having the first pick in snake drafts is unfair.  All fantasy basketball should be auctions from here on out.  I might have to do that for RCL.  But the peril in that is some schmohawk buying KD, someone like Stephen Curry, then someone like Serge Ibaka, then leaving for autodraft.  Thoughts Razzball Nation?

Enes Kanter - Modeled his game after Tristan Thompson to get into the starting lineup.  12/10/0.9/0.3/0.3 in March.  Hey, there’s value there though!  Too bad he’s awful on D and I don’t think has a future as a starter – more an effective reserve 4/5.  But for the rest of this year, you can get your dub-dub on!

Nikola Vucevic - Damn, I wish he was on more of my teams.  Might have made a difference down the stretch!  22/10/4/1/2 shooting 10-13.

Gorgui Dieng - 11 boards in only 19 minutes.  5/11/0/2/0 isn’t going to get it done in shallower leagues, but man, he’s going to be a sexy sleeper next year if Nikola Pekovic heads elsewhere.

Shaun Livingston - About to nickname him “Steady as she blows!”  Haha, sorry, that’s Monica Lewinsky’s nickname.  Livingston is going to be a pretty hot free agent – so things will likely alter with a possible change of scenery – but to round out this year, solid multi-cat with good ratios.  13/2/4/0/2 shooting 4-5 with 5-6 FT yesterday.

Henry Sims - Criminally underowned.  16/7/1/1/0 on Saturday shooting 8-14.  On a fantastic run, and at least I hit a good call in March to have a high note towards the end of the year.

Blake Griffin - Doubtful tonight and a horribly timed injury.  I mentioned how durable he’d become last week too!  Matt Barnes, while already close to must-own territory regardless, looks to be a goldmine in the championship week.  15/10/2/1/1 with no TOs and a couple of threes on Saturday.

Terrence Jones - Waiting to [get] McHale‘d.  What’s great about that pun if you even got it, is the movie stars Whitney Houston.

Pero Antic - Was able to return Saturday for 13/12/1/0/0, was able to knock down a trey, and was able to avoid a single turnover.  I think he’s us-able.

Ray McCallum - Got the starting nod with Isaiah Thomas still ailing with a bad quad.  16/4/8/2/1 for McCallum in a big near-rainbow.  The big shocker was he played the full 48 minutes!  Solid run for Ray-Mac with no IT2, and would be a fine plug-n-play if still available and no IT2 tonight.

God-forsaken Bucks - 67 points on Saturday.  Wilt Chamberlain averaged 17 less than that for a full season.  Just an atrocity.

 

Next Game: BOS @ CHI tonight.  D.J. times two?  Will be interesting to see how the Celtics try to slow him down this time.  Let’s all cheer for Slim to take that REL crown and have a good opening day of baseball while you set up your lineups!

  1. Jason says:
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    could you rank Kaman Antic Birdman and McCallum

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Jason: Well McCallum doesn’t fit with the big men, I would take the big men as you ranked them, probably take Kaman first either way for now, then McCallum second given even needs

  2. Sherm says:
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    Welp, I lost this year because one day out of the freaking playoffs I forgot to move two guys over from the bench, they scored 52 f-points, and I lost by 13. Thanks for the advice, JB, you will be getting that drink. I didn’t lose because you steered me wrong!

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Sherm: Damn that sucks man! Yeah I am in a chump work league with 6 teams I didn’t check and got bounced out losing by 2 in two cats. But I was in baseball mode/leagues that matter mode haha

  3. Lasandro says:
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    “I feel like a fkn idiot” #ADquotes

    Great great write up mate. Same question I posed to Dan.. After today’s game, I’m gonna cut Amir and grab me someone else with 4 games left on the docket for the week. For strong dub dub potential, who should I go with between these: J Hill, Sammy D, T Jones, Kanter, Asik, Kaman or the newly dropped Pau ? Love Sims but he only plays 3 times from 1 April.. may grab him the following week perhaps, if I dont revert back to Amir

    • Lasandro says:
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      Also, did you know that the entire Waiting To Exhale OST was produced by Babyface? Yes I’m a 90′s r&b fiend

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Lasandro: Haha love the AD quotes. Thanks man! I’d probably take Kanter for consistent dub-dubs, Kaman for the upside. Yeah Sims isn’t quite as big a dub dub threat but I like him a ton. And it was directed by Forest Whitaker! That surprised me looking it up

  4. Slim

    Slim says:
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    The Mayor of Whoville had an uber sexy rainbow last night. 17/5/2/2/2 with 2 3s, 6/12 FGs, 3/3 FTs, and only 1 TO. My love affair with RKelly continues. “There ain’t nothin’ wrong, with a little bump and grind.” I wonder what kinda of hate mail I’m going to get next year when I call him a top 50 player.

    I can’t believe I made the finals in the REL. My draft was so bad, $36 Sanders, $9 Porter, $17 Bennett, $30 Hibbert. I think my year long pessimism was warranted considering my draft. I got here with trades and some incredibly lucky waiver adds. Augustin, Kelly, Gooden, Adrien. 3 out of 4 cost me only $1.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Slim: Damn yeah that was a nice-un, just so hard to fully trust any Lakers. If he looks like a full-year starter, I could buy in a little, wouldn’t go top 50 tho. He’s your LL next year! Yeah you turned your season around mightily, remember when I was ahead of you?! Haha

  5. TR says:
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    I made it to 2 championships out of my four leagues, including the one I care about most! Hopefully I’ll pull one out… Blake griffin injury hurts me but I’ve still got KD, CP3, Joakim and a more!

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @TR: Nice man, awesome work! I envy you haha I’m out everyone, rough year for my teams. Best two teams I had last picks in snakes, got Ibaka and Wall in both but wasn’t enough.

  6. Taki says:
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    Hey man, whats going on? How do you feel about Isaiah Canaan (Hou – PG)?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Taki: Not much man, loving this time of year! He’s a little interesting, a little undersized and I think Lin can handle the big minutes so not expecting too much while PBev is out, but some deeper league asts and treys I can buy

  7. frankiejay says:
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    Start 4 tonight:

    Ben McLemore @NO
    Randy Foye v Mem
    Al-Farouq Aminu vs SAC
    Lance Stephenson vs SA
    Jimmy Butler vs BOS
    Taj Gibson vs BOS

    Any help you can give. Thanks!

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @frankiejay: I think the bottom 3 are locks. Then probably Aminu given he’s getting the minutes

  8. Wutang says:
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    made it to the finals.. on CP3 and a few waiver wire warriors backs, thanks to you guys! LA was a huge draft pick for me, got him in the 3rd round – no one expected what he gave out!

    picked up Caron Butler last week for 3′s, thinking I’m gonna try to win them again this week with a big streamer. Any suggestions? Still have him tonight, so I’m looking to HOPEFULLY get a 4 game slate out of whoever it may be, but I have an overfilled Friday night so I gotta keep that in mind. Hopefully the wire can work some more magic and we’ll be set!

    tross and matt barnes are on the wire, but both play tonight and friday.. so i’d only get 2 games out of them… 10 teamer 9 cat, hopefully we can work some magic!

    side note, i was behind by ~8 blocks last week (meaning i only had 16 and he had 23), so i have a chance of winning that if i get a block warrior… but doesn’t seem like i really have a chance, with boogie and chandler leading the way with 3 blocks each last week..

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Wutang: Nice! Geez, third round?! I was kinda down on LA, but not that much! Starting with blocks, Birdman on sunday could help, Draymond Green, B Wright or Dalembert tomorrow? Maybe Kaman is available? For treys, Jodie Meeks is surely owned, umm Marcus Thornton tomorrow could be an option. Fast-paced v. Rockets. Vince Carter available? Another possibility.

      • Wutang says:
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        @JB Gilpin: VC’s available so ill probably take that path, as well as roll with Thornton stream for tomorrow night – looks like a great possibility to pick up a handful of 3′s! Right now, my team is looking like:
        PG: Paul, Augustin, Oladipo
        SG: Ariza, Ellis, Hayward
        SF: Harris, T Young, C butler
        PF: Aldridge, Jefferson
        C: T Chandler, Cousins

        Def drop Caron butler, but I’m not even sure if I could drop another for a stream…. I know Friday night it looks like I’m sitting Ariza in my most packed night, but even still he’s getting me 3′s anways…..

        Maybe I should go blocks with asik and dalembert…. Or maybe I should go watch baseball again… (Reyes didn’t make it an inning without an injury… Oh my poor jays)

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @Wutang: Nice! Threes I like to wait on through the week, or at least see how monday goes. Do that AND watch baseball! Haha. Yeah man, Reyes and those hammies, why I haven’t touched him in years.

  9. Freddy says:
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    Finals week and I need Dragic w 3 games or Teague w 4.
    Milsap, Thad Young or Terrance Jones all w 4. Mil sap slumping and TJones w/o Howard clogging up the lane?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Freddy: Hmmm that’s a toughie. might roll dice on Dragic. I think I’d rank those PFs the way you have them, still most faith in Millsap.

  10. Jeremy says:
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    Pretty concerning performance out of trey Burke last night. Stick with him or would you play ariza ahead of him tonight?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Jeremy: Yeah was a rough one, but good D from Westbrook and RJax can do that. That said, I think I’d go Ariza either way

  11. Bi-Felicia says:
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    3for3 in H2H Now it’s time to win the hardware! & JB, I just woke up feeling blue….haha

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Bi-Felicia: Nice!

  12. Bi-Felicia says:
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    Stras just gave up a 3 run duck to “what’s his name” LOL The mutts? Really?

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Bi-Felicia: Yeah brutal start for him. And for me with starting Scheppers in a league. Yikes! At least Samardzija, a big call for me this year, started hot

      • Bi-Felicia says:
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        At least you didn’t start sheppers and lee. I did! But I have 92.5 pts in one RCL started off great!

  13. Bi-Felicia says:
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    Oh shit? I won the ncaa bracket? Well..I’ll get back to you on the naming rights. Here I thought I won razzball season tickets to the Milwaukee Bucks Show! HAHA

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Bi-Felicia: Ummm I think it’s all but official, but don’t quote me on that. Oh man, season tickets would be AWESOME for the Bucks. Socially acceptable to be hammered, and then heckle

  14. Zar says:
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    Thank you JB and slim, all my teams have gotten into the Finals. One of my teams was literally carried by KD. Your guidance has done well so far! For this week, would you take Asik or JV? Also, I picked up Kyrie on Sunday. Sounds like 2 games this week for him, maybe. Should I take Irving, Terrance Jones, or Shaun Livingston? I need guards more.

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @Zar: Awesome man! Really appreciate it! I’ll revert back and take JV haha. Since you need Gs, if it’s weekly I’d go safe and take Livingston.

  15. AJ says:
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    Is it time to add Kyrie asap? He might be back Wednesday so I hear..thanks

    • JB Gilpin

      JB Gilpin says:
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      @AJ: If you’re in the final week this week, I think you can pass unless dropping a scrub that is playing MWF (since almost everyone is playing on these big days). If roto, or more than this week of playoffs left, then yeah he’s gotta get grabbed

      • AJ says:
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        @JB Gilpin: yea today is the first day of a 2 week final…who would you drop from Carroll, Sullinger, Greives?

        • JB Gilpin

          JB Gilpin says:
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          @AJ: Yeah you gotta grab him then, losing Vasquez

  16. Daniel Bryan says:
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    Hey JB. Got to the finals on my work league. Got lucky though. My opponent had A.Davis and IT2. Unfortunately, I’m facing a team with Kevin Durant. I’m also pretty crappy at FG%, FT%, and TO. Basically I need to sweep 3pt,Reb,Ast,Stl,Blk. Can you recommend some guys from the waiver wire?

    2nd question, I have 12 players playing on Wednesday so I need to bench two. Who do you recommend I bench out of the following: M. Barnes, T. Gibson, H. Sims, T. Harris, D. Collison, B. Jennings, J.Hill?

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