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Twas the first night of the playoffs, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even Eddie House.  Wait, I can’t rhyme house and House.  At least I would think not, I tried to tell my buddies who listen to rap that Rick Ross’ “Everyday I’m Hustlin” is lazy because he rhymes Atlantic with Atlantic.  “But they are different uses of Atlantic!”  Pssssh.  Wow, way off track.  The playoff brackets were hung on the league sites with care, all in hopes St. Terrence Jones would be there.  And be there he was!  “Stop it with all the Christmas shizz, it’s March already!”  Don’t start a war on Christmas with me, intolerable commenter!  Dwight Howard was a late scratch with an ankle, and while we all know TJones starts anyway, it opened a bigger void for the TJ.  TJ Entered the Void.  Lots of minutes for the TJ.  38 in fact, for 30/5/1/1/4 hitting three treys and not having a single TO.  Now, before you go crazy sauce on me, remember this was against a defending force of Marvin Williams and Enes Kanter.  Jones got whatever he wanted.  The Jazz were singing to him like Selena Gomez.  Oh man, wow, sad that I know that… Anyway, Dwight will be back for the Rox next game on Thursday and I’m not ready to snatch up TJ really any differently that I was before.  We all know his upside and the situation was ripe – this was against a terrible team and an influx of minutes from a last second scratch.  I think TJ could easily disappoint his next few given his sparse usage when Dwight returns.  Here’s what else I saw last night in fantasy hoops:

Psyche!  I stole this trick from Grey.  If you haven’t voted yet for our first annual Razzball Basketball Razzies, submit your votes now!  Ok, back to the recap:

Kyrie Irving – Jacked up a biceps tendon.  Re-evaluated in two weeks.  Which means, it’ll be longer than two weeks.  So ummm, yeah, that Razzies link there – check out what I said on Irving…  Yup, I jynxed him real bad… If you have a bye this week I’d try to hold, if not, I’d still use caution early in the week.  Nothing would blow worse than losing in the finals to whoever scooped him up.

Andre Drummond – Not going to play Wed and questionable Fri.  But you can’t get mad, he’s really stuck his neck out for you this year.

Tony Wroten – With no James Anderson, 36 minutes of 17/4/4/0/1 ball.  Plus 3-3 FT as he is dramatically improving his previously horrendous FT shooting.  You could say he separated his sole to hit more freebies.

Henry Sims – I was buying in after the breakout last week, slowed down as one would expect, but decent-ish 9/11/3/0/1 last night.  Did shoot only 3-10, but is still getting the 5 run on a crappy wanna-be-fast-paced team.

Pero Antic – 27 baller minutes of 11/10/2/1/0 and three treys.  He’s like a better, rebounding Andrea Bargnani!

Eric Bledsoe – Only 23 minutes in the loss.  That’s a little scurry.  10/5/5/1/0 is still usable, and I guess leaving Gerald Green in for 31 minutes makes some sense since Green hit three treys – but he did virtually nothing else.

Mason Plumlee – Beat out his brother!  14/11/1/2/0 in the battle of the Plumlees.  I watched the tip of this game, and man, one of the scrappiest opening tips you’ll ever see!

Deron Williams – If your playoff matchup started with Deron’s 11-13, you’re feeling pretty dandy with FG%!  If against D-Will, then not so dandy.  Dand-rough.

Shaun Livingston – Have him in a couple of leagues now.  12/1/5/1/1, shot 6-11, played 32 minutes, I haven’t been this excited about a Liv since I saw Armageddon.  I wanted to be that animal cracker!

Joakim Noah vs. Russell Westbrook – In the epic battle of which would get a trip-dub first, we have… No victors!  But two closuns with Noah’s 9/12/9/2/1 near rainbow to start your week and RW’s 17/9/9 with three treys.  Both shot terribly (2-8 and 5-14, respectively), but splitting nose hairs here.  RW only two TOs and Noah with a goose egg.  Noah gets the win!

Taj Gibson – Yessir!  Although I think I streamed his spot in a few leagues last week.  Whoops.  16/7/1/0/2.  After a three game lull, back-to-back nice ones.  I’m going back in.

Alec Burks – Has been a really good find.  15/1/2/1/1 shooting 6-9 was nice, the 4 TOs – not so much.  Still, only 18 minutes was weird, but chalking it up to Tyrone Corbin so frustrated with his team that he refuses to listen to Miles Davis now.

Patrick Beverley – Almost banged on Enes Kanter sooooo bad.  But didn’t, and ended up with a sexy 19/7/3/1/1 line anyway.

Donatas Motiejunas – Extended run with no Dwight and a lot was garbage time, but 7/11/3/2/1 is stuffin’ it up with a trey for good measure.  0-2 FT and 5 TOs dampens the mood, and all the sudden it’s like a low-rent Josh Smith.  Boooooooo!

Jeff Green – Just… like… what?  Such a weird and brutal line of 5/9/4/1/0 shooting 2-12 with 6 TOs.  Yikes.

Kris Humphries – His reign of terror as staying fantasy relevant continues.  5/14/1/1/1, and while he shot only 2-8, at least no TOs!

Jared Sullinger – Still my pick as the Boston 5 to own, but man, you wonder why there is no consistency with this team!  Well, Rajon Rondo sitting out didn’t help much…

Blake Griffin – Rainbow alert!  26/12/4/2/2, but in a loss.  Man, would be so conflicting if you’re a Clippers fan and a Griffin fan.  You want those rainbows, but he only gets em when we lose!

Kenneth Faried – Man-i-mal!  Man-i-mal!  18/16/2/1/1 and on a tear.  The Manimal could have mad cow disease!  I know, that was a force, but it does mean I said mad cow disease in all three of my posts today.  That’s right, three posts, three crazy ass cows!

 

Next Game: WAS @ SAC tonight.  Excited to see how Drew Gooden is still making it work.  I hope everyone had a great start to their playoff matchup, and go get em tonight!