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In a tragedy fit for Dick Van Dyke, Chicago’s Carlos Boozer threw off everyone’s draft rosters earlier this week by tripping over a bag on his way to answering the doorbell and breaking his hand. What is Boozer’s house like that there is no clear path to the front door? Because ol’ Charlie Drunkard isn’t as fast as the Jimmy John’s delivery guy ringing his doorbell, he’s out for the first 15 games of the season. First Prince paints Boozer’s house purple, now this. Aren’t there night clubs this guy can escape to so he’s not home all the time? I realize he’s still got a little youthfulness in him and he wants to spend it inside his house not doing anything wrong, but it’s getting him into trouble. Hopefully there are a few family and friends that he’s surrounds himself with that can get through to him; show him how much distress this guy’s homes have caused him. The Horseshoe Casino just opened up last September in Chicagoland. That place is open 24 hours. Hopefully from now on, he’ll spend all his free time there instead of sitting in front of the TV quietly catching up on episodes of “Rubicon.” Anyway, know Boozer down your cheat sheet but not off. Sixty-seven games of Carlos Boozer is still 67 games of Carlos Boozer.

Here’s what else went on around fantasy basketball this week:

Troy Murphy – He’s been slowed for a few weeks with a groin injury, now he’s out indefinitely with a lower back injury. This tells us three things: 1) Terrence Williams and Derrick Favors might see more time if this is a full-blown Fall of Troy-type situation. 2) For Favors, this is not good news. In fact, I think it might crush him forever. He’s looked real bad at every step of the way so far in this league and thrusting him into major minutes might be worse than gifting Yao Ming a trampoline for his birthday. 3) Troy Murphy must have huge plums if his groin injury turned into a lower back injury. That’s Joan Holloway territory.

Jeff Pendergraph – Some prefer Barry White, I prefer Jeff Pendergraph. No one sang, “The More I Get the More I Want” like ol’ Jeff. He got the start in center on Tuesday because everyone else was hurt. He’ll want more, but Camby was healthy enough to get in there for the second preseason game. Then it was revealed that Pendergraph hurt his knee. Can someone convince Dan Brown to write a novel about the center position of the Portland Trailblazers? Watch your ass Dante Cunningham. UPDATE: Jeff Pendergraph’s season is over. He tore his ACL.

Channing Frye – It’s a good thing I’m not paying much attention to the preseason because Frye hasn’t played a lick in two straight games, no one knows why and miraculously, he’s played better than every last one of his teammates so far. Yup. Glad I’m not paying any attention. Keep an eye on Frye. Or just Fr-eye, you choose. UPDATE: Razzball commenter d2bnz alerted me that Frye’s wife had a baby. A small Frye, if you will.

Jonas Jerebko – Come sit next to me, pour yourself some tea, ruptured a-chil-les, out ’til April possibl-y. Words of deep concern from this little blogger. Give the same long look to Greg Monroe during the draft as you would to a model eating an ice cream cone.

Dwyane Wade – Out a couple weeks with a strained hamstring. He made it through 3:17 of play. At the rate of 3:17 every two weeks, he’s going to play a little over 25 minutes this entire season. I’m convinced this happened because LeBron and Wade are trying to establish dominance as the team leader and both refused to stretch in front of the other on Tuesday. I don’t need to stretch, I’m good. I’m good too. Stretching is something Bosh would do.

Derrick Rose – In his third preseason game, Rose attempted three 3-pointers in 31 minutes. He missed all of them, but still. He only attempted 3+ treys six times in 78 games last season, and played at least 37 minutes in each of those six games. This is preseason, so it’s not huge news, but it’s worth mentioning. Even if he only shoots .250 from the arc this season, if he attempts three threes every night, he’ll average somewhere between 0.7 and 1.0 3ptm per game. Progress!

Deron Williams – Missed Wednesday’s practice with “gastric distress.” Note to readers: I attempted to call in sick to work citing “gastric distress.” My boss paused, told me to either chew some bran or stop eating burritos and high-tail it to work pronto. Just another example of athletes being nothing like regular folk.