RCL BasketballRazzball Hoops Nation!  It’s that time of year where you bring your smack to the table, your chips into the pot, your yelling at my ranks to the battleground.  It’s RCL time for Basketball and I’m excited for the best RCL season this side of Jeff Hornacek’s short-shorts.

 

Listen, I know RCL last year didn’t go very smoothly over here on hoops.  I took over as editor mid-season, had a lot of things not transition well, and I take responsibility for not shepherding through the final few months when I took over as well as I could have.  To make up for it, I went to Grey on my hands and knees and pleaded for the biggest prize pool we’ve ever given out with the sweetest Razz-pimp gear.  The top winner will get a 2013-2014 RCL Champion Jumpsuit (branded basketball of course) and their choice of a Razzball T-Shirt.  Second place won’t go empty-handed either, and will get a T-shirt of their own as well.  But it doesn’t stop there.  As an acknowledgement of shame and embarrassment from last year, I will shave (well – will have a professional barber somewhere – hopefully from Barbershop) the winning team’s name in my head and post on the Razzball YouTube channel.  That way when you see the back of my head like in my avatar pic, you’ll see in painstaking pale scalp skin the name of your winning team.  Wear your sunglasses!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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The Razzball Community, like a single barrel scotch, is bold and strong. And like a single barrel scotch in the bloodstream of a Las Vegas stripper, we like to spread our butt cheeks and then drive while intoxicated. Wait, what? Anyway, the Razz-comm (<- term that won’t catch on) enjoy nothing more than to match wits and skills with each other in the fantasy arena (there may be things we enjoy more, but we’ll leave that to the philosophers). The season has come to a close, those of you who weren’t sure if J.R. Smith was for real can finally put that question to rest, and our RCL winners have emerged, basking in the glow of victory. “I remember when I was alive, I lived for the taste of success! So says I, the ghost of Dolph Schayes!” Damn you, Dolph, you aren’t dead yet! “Mayhaps, but your career is!” Moving on…

Please, blog, may I have some more?

The Razzball Commenter League is the most exciting fantasy basketball competition in all of eastern Europe and parts of Asia. It’s been a while since we’ve checked in, so let’s cut the bull feces and dive in with our boots on (all league names transcribed as displayed):

Ain’t No Sushine When It RainsSlippery Squirrels leads the pack with 72 points, although Bringin back Seattle is only 4 points back. Fun(?) fact: SS is also the overall leader of the Razzball Commenter Leagues. The most recent trade was a while ago, but it involved We Be Wall’n sending Jrue Holiday, Luol Deng and Joakim Noah to Motorboaters for Dwyane Wade and Marc Gasol. Although I’d rather have the Wade/Gasol side, the trade was fair to both sides. Good game, boys.

Please, blog, may I have some more?