Ay dios mio!

Friday was a cryday for me.  Then Saturday was a sadderday.  Muy triste!  Ricky Rubio severely sprained his ankle in the second quarter against the Magic Friday night, effectively crushing several of my teams and ruining my DraftKings squad!  Seems like every year there’s several bad ankle sprains with players rolling their foot on their own, get these guys better footwear!  Rubio’s gonna miss at least a month, with a widely circulated update it “could” be 7-8 weeks.  All I want for Christmas is Rubio back on the court!  I’m holding in virtually all leagues, as he was finally banking on the high expectations I’ve set for him with my high ranks the past two years.  Because we all know the Razzball Ranks are bulletin board material for NBA locker rooms…

Everything seemed to point towards a massive workload for Mo Williams, who through the first four games (with Rubio in there full time as the starter), Mo was averaging 21.4 minutes and 3 dimes per.  But surprisingly, Flip Saunders went sushi on us with the raw Zach Lavine getting the start and going 5/6/4 in 26 minutes (only 2 TO) while Mo’s 2/4/5 in 22 minutes (3 TO) doesn’t inspire any sort of confidence Williams will get more rock.  Add into the stew the Wolves were actually in that game against the Heat until the end, and it’s a stew I don’t think I want any part of anymore.  I mean, who puts sushi in a mother f stew?!  Here’s what else went down over the weekend in fantasy basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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This NBA DFS season has been kind of a roller coaster ride.  The ownership of players is higher than normal.  Seems like everyone is on the same value players night after night.  If your high priced players you spend on don’t tank and reach value then you’re going to do well.  So be smart and don’t take too many risky players.  Also with the NFL, NHL and College Football going on too, be smart with your bankroll.

On Saturday we have a 7 game slate:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It feels like each time I have to submit the weekly injury report, someone big gets a last minute injury. The first week it was Victor Oladipo and his facial fracture. Last week, it was Russell Westbrook. Let’s hope that this week no one gets hurt after I hit submit.

Speaking of Russell Westbrook, he will be out 4+ weeks after surgery to repair his broken right hand. This is a huge blow to the Thunder who are already hurting with injuries. They are so desperate for a living, breathing player that they signed Ish Smith as part of their hardship exception. He is definitely not the Ish and should not be anywhere close to fantasy rosters.

Fortunately for the Thunder, and fantasy owners, Reggie Jackson is back from his ankle injury. He already has 36 points and 19 assists in just two games back. Jackson should continue to be a fantasy beast, but expect his field goal percentage to dip with the added pressure as the lead scorer.

Since Jackson is definitely already owned, Perry Jones is the next best Thunder option to pick up. Averaging 15 points and 4 rebounds, Jones should continue to see playing time, while knocking down threes. He’s day-to-day with a bruised knee, but shouldn’t be out for long.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Exclusivity.  Makes you feel special, empowered, embrazened.  Embatlled, embaweome, Embiid-ish.

Yes, you’ve read that right, DraftKings – Razzball’s daily fantasy site of choice – has thrown us our first RAZZBALL EXCLUSIVE NBA CONTEST for tonight, which you can only join through that All Caps link.  Yes, it may look like I’m yelling at you, but I’m pumped!  You can’t enter through the main DraftKings lobby or from a URL scribbled down on a napkin by your lunch waitress, only that link right there will guide you into our VIP area.

And by exclusive, we mean exclusive.  Only 20 spots will be open to readers, and well, it’s only 18 since Slim and I are in there.  So you’ve gotta sign up quick, no dilly dallying!  The entry fee is $10, with first place taking home a hunnet!  $100 for first, $50 for second, and $25 for 3rd and 4th place.  Using my Mickey Math (yes I had one of those as a kid!), you can add those up to get the full $200, so DraftKings is not taking any profit.  Just giving us our own contest for our own bragging rights.

If you’re new to daily fantasy, it’s an exponentially growing segment of the fantasy industry, and unlike failing the Marshmallow Test, you can get immediate gratification without feeling bad about it.  No more waiting the whole season before knowing if indeed JB BEATS SLIM!!!!, but I’ll know right away if I spanked his beard right off him.  I’m “jbrazzball” for your tracking enjoyment through the contest, and let’s get it filled up fast so maybe they’ll give widen us up for a few more spots!

Scoring for DraftKings is similar to a points league, and you can find the breakdown here if you’ve never played daily fantasy or haven’t played on DraftKings yet.

Here’s five of my picks for tonight in a big slate of games, so choose wisely and may the best daily fantasy-ite win:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Man, both NBA games last night were atrocious…  Even if the Rockets McDonald’s unis were effing awesome, love those 90s reds and yellows!

Gregg Popovich sat Manu Ginobili and Tim Duncan (on top of Marco Belinelli and Tiago Splitter injured) that’s sure to get Adam Silver pitching a tent in his NBA-fines PJs.  With no Duncan or Splitter, the Spurs had to play Aron Baynes and Boris Diaw at C.  Wow.  And against an inconsistent-at-best post player in Dwight Howard!  But Dwight destroyed his “defenders” and looked like a 17 year old high school kid with college aspirations playing against middle schoolers.  Like watching Taco Fall play against other high school JV teams.  Man, Taco makes a basketball look like a grapefruit!

There’s really only one explanation to last night’s travesty – Pop owns Dwight on his fantasy team.  And well, let’s guess Kevin McHale drafted Tim Duncan and was against Pop this week.  Pop DOES NOT like to lose in fantasy basketball.  I’d imagine when he talks to his fantasy opponents it goes something like this.  “What’s more powerful than me winning every year?  Hope.  That I’d ever let anyone else win!”  Dwight for 32/16/0/1/2 shooting 12-18 from the field.  It was pretty bad out there, matchup wise.  He did his Dwight thing missing FT but ended up fine hitting 8-13.  I’m very steadfast in my anti-Dwight ways, so if you have Howard and have thought about trading, this is the game to be off of to do it.  Here’s what else went down in a light slate of Thursday action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

JB insists on calling me a hoarder and quite frankly it’s getting old. At least once a week I have to hear, “why do you still have every VHS and cassette tape you’ve ever owned? You don’t even own a working VCR anymore.” Since I seem to never answer the same question the same way twice he gets a wide variety of responses. From, “It’s an investment I’ve been sitting on for 25 years. You want to buy my collection for, pinky to mouth, one million dollars?” to “There’s chemicals in the tape that are good for my joints, it’s like those magnetic bracelets, same thing.” Either way the gist is always the same. They aren’t going anywhere… but he keeps asking anyway. If you don’t mind I’m going to go ahead and put this one to rest. I’m not quite sure how to explain it though. It’s the same reason I bought everyone’s broken VCRs and walkmen before they threw them away. Maybe it isn’t the most useful thing today, but one day I’m going to find one that works and when I’m watching E.T. on my 13 inch, 20 lbs TV and flashing gang signs to my early 90’s gospel rock well then, who’s going to be 2 Legit 2 Quit now?

If I’m a hoarder then so be it, and it won’t just be the classics like ‘Madonna: Truth or Dare’. I’ll stash away the next widely added fantasy player too and when they win the starting job JB might stop asking why I keep a cassette single of ‘Material Girl’ and he’ll start asking me the real hard hitting questions when he stops by. Before this gets too serious though let me just pre-empt you JB. No, I won’t make you a copy until you perfect your 2-L-2-Q. You are yet still unworthy.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I gotta say, last night might have been one of the most exhilarating early season nights of NBA action that I can remember for some time.  Career-highs, two buzzer beaters, a triple double, upset Ws… It was awesome.

Before we get into how the city of Cleveland can just give up hope… again… if you haven’t noticed on the main page of the site, Slim is in need of a new didgeridoo!  When my awful Hornets somehow beat the Heat, he took his frustration out on his favorite instrument, banging the wood in fervent frustration.  Wow, that sounded wrong!  But Razzball Nation can help!  Click on his donate button there to help him buy a new didgeridoo, for any value you wish, especially as a thanks for helping with the comments in the wee hours of the morning whilst I beauty sleep snuggled up with my Brandon Knight blow up doll.

But before that mental image is indefinitely burnt into your subconscious, let’s get back to action on the court where the big game was obviously the Jazz knocking off the Cavs on a Gordon Hayward buzzer beating fader.  “Look Butler fans, I can hit big buzzer beater shots!”  Awwwww, low blow… The Cavs had all sorts of terrible sluiced through their stats, like six, count em, SIX assists in the entire game.  Four were from LeBron too.  I guess the other Cavs want to prove to LeBron they all can be ball hogs.  In contrast, the Spurs had six assists on their first six field goals in their win last night…  But not like they’re a model franchise or anything!

As NBA fans, which all of us are even if we care more about fantasy than anything else, last night was a winner.  I guess unless you’re a David Lee owner, or Cleveland fan… There’s always Green, or the Browns tonight!  Colors to the rescue!  Here’s what else went down in fantasy hoops action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You might as well set up a Civil War style triage on the Thunder bench, because somebody has the team set of Thunder voodoo dolls and isn’t wasting any time!  Adding to this virtually unprecedented injury wave to hit an NBA team through only week one of the season, Perry Jones knocked knees for the second game in a row; this time in a ton of pain and had to exit.  They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so check out the Thunder depth chart on Rotoworld, where the red S means sidelined:

Oklahoma City Thunder Depth Chart

Oklahoma City Red S-es!  And while a “knee contusion” usually wouldn’t worry me too much, George Hill had the same deal and he’s going to be out until late-November is sounds…

On the plus side, Serge Ibaka is absolutely en fuego out there.  25/11/2/0/1 and forced to take contested jumpers the whole night, but hit 11-14 including three treys.  And played 46 minutes out of desperation!  The blocks will come, so if you got Serge late round 1 (like we had him) or round 2, you’ve got something of your own surging in your pants.

On the negative side, Reggie Jackson is playing with some ill-advised reckless abandon.  I mean, give the kid some props for playing through numerous injuries last night, but he ended up with his butt on the hardwood more often then Paris Hilton.  Had a fantastic slash of 13/4/14 but hurt his wrist limiting him to 4-14 FG (0-6 3PTM).  Plus the ankle still looks gimpy.  I know the upside is immense the next month, but I might try to sell RJax high after watching this game.  It was like watching Denard Robinson at Michigan.  I’m not a huge college football fan, but my dad went there and I watch parts of most games, and Shoelace is still the most dynamic player I’ve ever seen in Maize & Blue.  But he seemed to leave early almost every game, getting battered and beaten up.

The Thunder need to do everything and anything to get healthy, with three straight off days until Friday.  My recommendations include – every player eating a live octopus chasing it with raw eggs, hiring the Wolverine (Jackman, not Denard) for some mutant healing blood, and calling Mrs. Cleo to figure out which guy will be hurt on Friday and benching him.  Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Anyone watch the Mavs host the Celtics last night?  Game be scrappy!  Rajon Rondo tackled Monta Ellis towards the end trying to restrain him for a hard foul, and I got confused if I was watching hoops or that MNF tragedy!  Ellis held his knee for a bit there, so let’s hope he’s OK…

But the big story in that one was Jeff Green‘s absurdity.  Well, it actually mimicked the absurdity of this game.  Down 30 in the second quarter, the Celtics somehow came back – in Dallas – to make it a nailbiter to the finish.  The Mavs took Jeff Green as seriously as fantasy owners this year, and he had one of his three monster games he’ll have this season.  35/7/2/1/2 shooting 14-28 including 5-12 from downtown.  If there was ever a sell high game, this would be it.  You need any data to back it up?  How about after his last big game – 39/6 with four treys against the Pelicans on March 16th, 2014?  The subsequent 8 games immediately afterwards – 11.8/3.6/2.3 shooting 34% from the field.  Green is Brandon Jennings in a SF/PF body.  They couldn’t even do a Freaky Friday remake with these two, they’d wake up and look at their new bodies in the mirror and go, “meh, at least I can still get hot one game outta ten shooting the ball…”

Green’s first two games were the expected blah, and he just doesn’t do anything but score and trey… Glorified ThrAGNOF!  Is Chris Copeland really that much worse than Jeff Green right now?  Maybe Citizen Copeland doesn’t have this kind of big game upside, but it’s why we preach to stream your threeballers.  Stream your polyorchids!  Learn something new every day here at Razzball… Here’s what else went down last night in fantasy hoops action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t listen to country music…  I don’t listen to that emo we talked about last Friday anymore either… This is quickly turning into JB’s music blog (I’ll always shoot anyone some recommendations if you want rock/shoegaze/ambient stuff!  Flip side to Grey’s rapcoin!)…

Anyway, I googled The Band Perry, because well, I know that they’re something popular, and the first image looks like some hot chick standing in front of two of the Stark ninnies from Game of Thrones.  Which would be a pretty apt way to think about the Thunder a mere month ago.  Kevin Durant & Russell Westbrook standing in front of some ninnies.  Don’t get me wrong, RJax and Lurch are some exciting young talent, but I preach da truff!  Then the injury bug swept the Thunder locker room more aggressively than Ebola media coverage (I would say just Ebola, but even THAT isn’t spreading as fast…), and everyone is hurt.  With all that offense recovering and enjoying painkiller prescriptions, somebody was bound to step up.  And why not the talented Perry Jones, who I compared in his first mention last year to James Johnson – multi-cat with 3s.  I knew the tags would help me!  Click on a player name on the bottom of the article there and you get every article that dude was mentioned…  Focus!  After that huge 32/7/3 breakout last Thursday night, encored it with 23/4/2/2/0 Saturday shooting 9-18 with three treys in a whopping 41 minutes.  While his rest of season outlook remains a little murky when the rest of Perry’s cast of Friends return, he’s an obvious must-add for the short term.  Another big week, and you can sell him faster than a Courtney Cox sitcom about boning cougars.  Here’s what else went down over the weekend in fantasy basketball action:

Please, blog, may I have some more?
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