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There once sailed a man named O’Quinn
Who played with the Magic to win
When put to the test
He could swat with the best
But he couldn’t keep hairs off his chin

Only gobdaws and bogtrotters are unaware of the fact that the fantasy basketball playoffs be upon us.

And if you’re a bit of a sap in the areas of rebounds and blocked shots, ya needn’t be foostering about the waiver wire like some kind of header.

Cop on! It’s St. Patrick’s Day, and the fine fella you be seeking is of course one Kyle O’Quinn.

The bearded big man is averaging 2.4 blocks over his last five games, including 4 in his last contest to go along with 6 points and 6 rebounds. Not exactly a pot of gold there. But when you factor in that he’s shooting almost 62 percent from the floor in his last three and has the potential to get a boatload of rebounds if Jacque Vaughn gives him minutes, you’ve got the Leprechaun’s attention.

The Magic are playing their boyos in the frontcourt. O’Quinn is in there at power forward next to Nikola Vucevic and Maurice Harkless. He’s already giving you plenty of blocks, and you’d have to be plastered off your nut and in the nip with a case of the scutters to pass on a chance to pick him up as a playoff battering ram.

Here’s what else I saw in the paint last week.

Andrew Bynum – You’re a slob who’s hard to move around, so, yeah, you got 10 rebounds against the Celtics. Yeah you grabbed 9 rebounds and blocked a shot against the Pistons, but it took you 18 shots to get 15 points (33 percent shooting). For fantasy purposes, a producing center is a producing center, but if Bynum gets a ring with the Pacers it’ll be the worst crime in NBA history since Glenn Robinson “earned” some finger jewelry with the Spurs in 2005.

Big NuggetsTimofey Mozgov gets the starts and the blocks, while J.J. Hickson gets the rebounds and the minutes. Overall I say Hickson is the better producer, averaging 9.3 rpg over his last three and scoring in double digits on the regular.

Brandan Wright – Scored 8 points with 8 rebounds and 2 blocks last night in OKC. He might flop on a one-night stand because he doesn’t get a ton of minutes, but dang that scorching field goal percentage sure looks nice.

Drew Gooden – Despite being 900 years old he came out and dropped a 21-9-1 turn-back-the-clock performance in Saturday’s win over the Nets, so kudos for that. Could be a nice stream for points and FG%, but I don’t see consistent rebounding or blocked shot contributions here.

Elton Brand – A few turdlet games in a row here, but pay no mind: Brand is going to be a solid playoff streamer, especially for blocks.

Ed Davis – Red alert! Red alert! We have an Ed Davis sighting: 6 points, 11 rebounds, 2 blocks and a steal for good measure in 19 minutes of work on Saturday against the … 76ers, eh, nevermind.

Giannis Antetokounmpo – Nothing to see here besides blocks. Dial him up if you have a revolving G/F slot.

Gorgui Dieng – Deep League Special! Dang I wanted Dieng so bad in the Razzball Expert League. Should have been getting more court time all year, and finally Rick Adelman’s brain began working again. In 37 minutes last night against SacTown (emphasis on the SAC), Dieng racked up 12 points, 11 boards, 5 blocks and 2 steals. Ronny Turiaf and Nikola Pekovic are both out, so I’d snag him while you can.

Henry Sims – The 20-10-2 against the Kings last week was great, and the two clunkers after that were expected. If you’re in a deep league or really banged up, then yes. If not, then hell no.

John Henson – Playing is good. Scoring in double digits is good. But this 6-11 noodle can’t rebound or block shots. Not good.

Kris Humphries – Hear me now, believe me later: For two straight seasons this dude averaged a double double. He’s had two-straight as the C’s starting C, including a 16-12-3 last night in a blues-inducing one-point loss in New Orleans. Nevermind that he allowed The Brow to get 40 and 21 – pick him up for some help on the boards.

Shane Battier – He’s no Dikembe but before last night’s game against the Rockets he had at least one block in six straight games. Who wants to sex Battier?

Little Big Man of the Week – George Hill: Averaged 5.2 rpg over the last week, including 6 (to go along with 14 points, 9 assists and 2 steals) Friday against the 76ers and 7 on Saturday in an otherwise crappy game against the Pistons. Hill is widely owned but he’s overly owned, and as such owners will sometimes come to realize this and send him back to the wire where he belongs. So if you see him and you’ve got a guard spot you’re streaming, he’s not a bad multi-cat guy to rent.

  1. Mic C says:
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    Augustin or jack the rest of the way?

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
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      @Mic C: DJ.

  2. Connor says:
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    Who do you like more as a streamer tonight? Birdman against the Cavs or oquinn against golden state?

    • Pete Nice

      Pete Nice says:
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      @Connor: O’Quinn. Just don’t know if Birdman will be unleashed or not.

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