Boston, Dallas, Memphis and the Lakers share one win amongst themselves and 10 losses. So understand me when I tell you that everything – absolutely everything – written here is a complete guess. So it goes when you’re watching basketball as messy as this.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Stephen Curry‘s ankle used up its final sick day of the year, because unlike weak ankles themselves, sick days don’t roll over. (Boom! Nailed it.) Dwyane Wade? His left foot caused an early exit. Then a quarter later, his right foot told his left to stop being such a damn sissy, strap on an extra sock and get back out there.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Here’s what you’re likely to hear around the fantasy blogosphere today: You’re likely to read that Norris Cole scored 14 of Miami’s final 24 points. You’re likely to be reminded of Mario Chalmers‘ embarrassing 6 tovs in 19 minutes. And if you read about those two things, you’re probably likely to read about how Cole is Miami’s newest, shiniest toy.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I added Robin Lopez in two of my leagues. I didn’t like doing it, but anytime a guy who was overhyped last year drops 21/7 in 27 reserve minutes, you kind of got to throw away your last pick and take a chance.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I was fortunate enough to be invited to Earth’s most classy and famous expert league – the FakeTeams Hoops Tournament.  The league has 14 teams consisting of three FakeTeamers (the hosts of this shindig), two guys from ESPN, one from Canada’s The Basketball Jones, one rep from Give Me the Rock, one from Fox Sports, one from Dime Magazine and fbasketballblog, RotoWorld, Damn Lies and Statistics, Life is Just a Fantasy … Basketball Blog and a partridge in a pear tree (I’m either the partridge or the tree, I’m not sure).

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You gotta have a draft routine; the things you do or eat or wear to ensure you’re in the best possible zone while picking players that you will spend the next seven, er, five months swearing at. What do you mean LaMarcus Aldridge might miss the start of the season?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

With the top 100 lists sealed in the vault (that could very easily be re-opened by anyone by clicking here), we’ve finished the Lavergne, the Shirley and the Lenny of fantasy basketball lists. Time to get Squiggy with it! These are the best of the rest.

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Having produced what feels like 900 reviews of every player ever to touch a Spalding, Razzball’s taking a 20 second timeout and squeezing its cramping side while it catches its breath. Until we’re ready to go-a wasseling again (sometime around noon today), a few announcements need announcing.

Please, blog, may I have some more?