Between trades and buyouts, more than 50 players will be wearing jerseys they weren’t wearing a week ago. Fifty. Five-oh, my! We’ve had three of the league’s top 20 players switch conferences (Aw, shucks. You still consider me top 20? Easy, Gerald Wallace. I’m going by my preseason rankings. Oh. Still. Thanks just the same.) The fantasy picture is as clouded as the whiskey sour haze Baron Davis drank himself into at about one yesterday afternoon when he found out that not only would he never throw Blake Griffin another alley-oop, but that only oops left in his season would probably result in a Cleveland turnover. Things just got real in the league, but not so real that our little fake basketball world should ignore it. So I won’t. And you won’t. And the royal We won’t. We will however, ignore last night’s rundowns. Only two games. Two of the teams were dealing with unpredictable rosters. LeBron dunked, Rose is fast, I miss Kendrick’s sour pucker, I’m going to call Denver the Knuggicks for at least another week. There. Done.
And now onto fantasy basketball trade deadline talk:
Nenad Krstic – It’s a shame Semih Erden was traded to Cleveland, because I really think they would have formed a bond while sitting on the bench.
Jeff Green – I said over and over during the preseason that Green was overrated. Then I got berated for saying it. Then he played significantly worse in the first 2/3 of the season than he had in either of his previous two seasons. Now, Green has downshifted from third fiddle to fifth (at best). So … not looking too good for that upswing.
Troy Murphy – I hate to do this to you. I really do. I pushed my luck with Ty Lawson and that mostly blew up in our face, didn’t it? So, I’m really, really sorry to suggest you stash Troy Murphy in case the Celtics buy out his contract. I’ll tell you what, stash Murph and if it doesn’t work out, I’ll totally let you punch me in the arm once as hard as you can.
Kendrick Perkins – Perkins to the Thunder surprised me more than the Deron Williams trade. I would have said that Ray Allen was more dispensable than Perkins. Whoops. This doesn’t do a whole lot for Perk good or bad. He’s still playing among a crowded center position, still likely to start. Serge Ibaka, on the other hand … well, I’ll put it this way, if you had to play behind someone, would you rather play behind Perkins or Nenad Krstic? Exactly.
Nate Robinson – He’s behind Sefolosha and Harden on the depth chart now. Then again, Harden should be in front of Sefolosha, so maybe Sugar Nate’s got a shot (Editor’s Note – He doesn’t). In other news, Nate’s totally gonna cream Durant in Call of Duty as soon as they get back to the hotel bunk beds.
Chase Budinger – Dropped 30 points a night before his immediate superior was traded away. That’s like questioning your boss during a meeting, then hitting him in the mouth with a whiffle bat. Actually, it’s nothing like that. Still, I’d add him in anything deeper than a 12-team league.
O.J. Mayo – Still a Grizzly.
Rip Hamilton – Still unhappy.
Gerald Henderson – Paul Silas said Henderson was in for some big minutes now that the Bobcats are wholly unwatchable. Have you ever heard Paul Silas speak? Dude’s, like, a double-baritone. I’m not sure what that has to do with anything, I just know I added Henderson in three of my leagues.
Boris Diaw – 10.2/6.3/4.2, while shooting .464 from the field while Gerald Wallace was out with injury. I imagine he won’t do much more than that now that Crash is on his way to another injury (It’s Portlandia – call it a hunch). Also, does anyone in Oregon actually refer to Bridge City as Portlandia?
Joel Przybilla – Should be a decent source for rebounds, blocks and ineffective FG%, though he’ll still be coming off the bench behind Kwame. Think Andris Biedrins minus the perfectly manicured hair.
Dante Cunningham – Oh, good. Another guy to take Tyrus Thomas‘ place. How many guys in this league have made a living being the guy they get when they don’t get T-Time?
Hasheem Thabeet – He went from playing backup center for a borderline playoff contender, to a … well, another borderline playoff contender where he’ll play backup center. But it’s different. It is. It just is.
Shane Battier – Back to Memphis. If you own Come Back, Shane!, Tony Allen or Sam Young it’s likely that the value of all three are going to dip a bit. On another note, I like the Grizzlies’ thinking here. They won’t make up for Rudy Gay‘s offensive weapons, so they pick up a defensive guy in hopes of boring opponents into losses.
Gerald Wallace – This has gotten a bit lost in the massive shuffle of the day, but Crash off-season or no Crash off-season, he’s played better than Nicolas Batum or any other Blazer playing the three this season. If you’ve been patient with Batum, you should probably go ahead and stop being that way. You got to figure some of Wallace’s struggles have come from having to play in the apathetic Bobcats camp. I like Wallace’s season from here on out. I like throwing him in a situation in which he’s necessary, playing for something, energized. He’s a maneater (but not in the Nelly Furtado sense), he’s a heartbreaker (but not in the Pat Benatar sense), a barracuda (but not in the Heart sense) who simply takes my breath away (totally in the Berlin sense). He’s healthy, he’s hungry, maybe now he’ll be happy.
Marquis Daniels – To the Kings. That is all.
Mo Williams – Dollars to donuts says he’s healthy in a week and playing the best ball of his season. Until then, Eric Bledsoe is about as solid a pickup as he was back in November. Which is to say, meh.
Baron Davis – Aaaand Boom-Dizzle goes the dynamite. He’s hurt, he’s fat, he’s on the worst team I’ve ever seen and it was the most appropriate trade all day.